Breakfast Fried Rice

My wife and I dreamed up this incredible concoction about a week ago. Last night we finally gave it a shot. It’s a pretty straight forward recipe, so no real instructional videos or any other complicated bullshit to show you.


What The Fuck Do You Need?

  • Pre-cooked bacon (it’s just easier)
  • Eggs
  • Ham steak
  • Frozen breakfast sausage
  • Frozen spinach
  • Jalapeño pepper
  • Chives
  • Onion
  • Garlic
  • Shredded cheese
  • Potato
  • Crispy fried shallots
  • Leftover rice from the fridge
  • Butter
  • Olive oil

How The Fuck Do You Make It?

The first thing you’ll want to do is some basic prep. Dice up your ham steak, potato, onion and jalapeño. Mince your garlic, and slice your chives, bacon and sausage. These will be more like “toppings” for your rice, so as not to moisten the rice while cooking together.


Fry some shit off in olive oil and butter. I did the potato, pepper, onion and garlic together to form a hash, and then I put it aside in a bowl lined with paper towels to get rid of some of the grease and excess moisture.


Since we used frozen spinach (you can use fresh), we threw that in a pan by itself to dry it out and remove all the excess water.


We gave a little fry to the bacon and sausage too. Here are some of the components before adding to the rice:


Grab your rice and throw it into a hot buttery wok or pan.


Once its all hot, you can mix in your scrambled egg, which you should first cook in a separate pan:


Once you get some snap, crackle and pop going, and some crispy browned rice forming at the bottom of the pan/wok, you can lower the heat and fry off the other egg separately for the top of the rice:


Fill a bowl with rice and start to assemble your dish by adding the toppings. Don’t forget the cheese!


Here’s a jerkworthy shot of the finished product:


Dive in and eat. I like to mix it all around, break the yolk, fold the spinach in, etc. Then I get a little bit of everything in each bite.

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