Category Archives: Product Reviews

OWYN Products

OWYN (Only What You Need) is a plant-based line of protein products. I recently picked up a shitload of their items because I was looking to try something new for high protein, low sugar and high fiber drinks, snacks and coffees. I know, I know… What the fuck is Johnny Prime doing with plant-based shit? Clearly I don’t give a fuck about ANY of that shit. But if it tastes good, I’m in! I DO eat vegetables, you know… Anyway here’s what I got:

Protein snack bars, protein coffee, protein drinks, and protein powder. Let’s start with the protein coffee.

I love this shit. This is now part of my morning routine.

The flavor is great, it gives me a little caffeine boost without being all jittery.

Next up, the snack bars:

As you can see, I got a shitload. These, in combination with a protein drink, are meant to be my lunch at work (since I eat like an unhinged maniac during most dinners) or an occasional sack after dinner if I’m still hungry. Here is a closer look at the flavors:

They’re mainly made up of seeds and natural plant protein isolates, like pea powder, pumpkin seeds, chia, etc. But they don’t taste like rabbit food, and the flavors aren’t too sweet or overwhelming. They’re just right.

The ready-to-drink protein shakes are awesome.

Vanilla is my least favorite of the three, but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad flavor by any stretch of the imagination. It’s just that the chocolate and strawberry/banana are better, in my opinion.

I’ve tried the powder once before; it was a coffee flavor. The vanilla and chocolate are better. They taste just like the pre-made shakes.

I totally stand behind these products. I think you’ll like them if you’re into this sort of stuff, regardless of the plant-based marketing. Give this shit a shot. If they can satisfy a rabid carnivore like me, I’m fairly certain they have an excellent product on their hands.

Zelite Infinity Knives

Incase you haven’t noticed, I have been going nuts over these awesome knives that I found on Instagram. They’re pretty gorgeous in the photos on their website, so I was psyched to try them out in person. I guess the best way to demonstrate is to show the unboxing videos and then me using them. I have four so far, so here we go…

6in Gokujo Boning Knife:

Here I am using it to pull some meat off the bone:

9in Kitisuke Chef Knife:

Here I am slicing a bunch of steaks with it:

Bird’s Beak Paring Knife:

Here I am using it to peel some lemon rinds and apple skin:

8in Executive Plus Chef Knife:

Here I am slicing up some strip steaks with it:

I can’t wait to get my hands on some more of these knives. They’re fantastic. Three of these are folded steel, double edged and really high end stuff. I love them.

Righteous Felon

I had my hands on Righteous Felon jerky one other time in the past, when I tried their Halo Diablo flavor that was a collaboration with the St. Lucifer habanero spice. I remember thinking it was really good. Well, Righteous Felon sent me some more samples:

My natural proclivity is to go for the spicy shit, so I picked the habanero flavored one (different from the St. Lucifer collaboration, for sure).

It was good! The rest were all superb as well. This is a great brand. If you see it on the shelf, grab it. And if you like puns, their entire line-up of flavor names is pun after pun.

Three Jerks

Three Jerks sent me some samples of their filet mignon jerky:

I was excited to try these out, as it seems to be quite an expensive and dedicated endeavor to take one of the animal’s most coveted cuts of steak and turn it into a dried meat snack. I was impressed.

The flavors are all quite good, but I liked this “maple bourbon churro” one the best, which is atypical since I usually like spicy flavored jerky. I definitely recommend this brand, and I look forward to trying their black truffle flavor next.

Kitchencue Stovetop Smoker

This is just a quick review of a new kitchen gadget I obtained after seeing some pics of it on Instagram. It’s a stovetop smoker that makes it easy to obtain smoked flavors without needing to open your windows or use something outside. My first attempt was with chicken.

The result was really nice – roasted and smoked. I will update this post as I try smoking more stuff.

Gary West Artisan Smoked Meats

It’s National Jerky Day so I need to give you fuckers something for it. I recently got my hands on a bunch of flavors of this brand during a Certified Angus Beef tour of a meat purveyor near NYC (DeBragga).

This stuff is really good, and it reminds me of the stem portions of the “Say it with Beef” jerky rose bouquet that my wife got me for Valentine’s Day.

I highly recommend this product. Every flavor is delicious, tender and flavorful, as they are all made with CAB brand high quality meats. If you see it around, buy it all up.

Georgia Land & Cattle Jerky

This stuff was sent to me by a friend from down south.

I really loved the peppery flavor it had. Good salt levels as well. The jerky itself was cut into long skinny strips, which made it easy to handle and eat. The meat was just a little brittle and hard to chew. Not that it wasn’t tender – it was just very hard/dried. Over all I enjoyed it though.

The Hotomizer

This product is pretty cool.

Spray on heat!

One or two squirts adds a nice, neutrals-flavored spice to any dish. I used it on leftover lasagna, pasta, pork tenderloin, and even in cocktails. I love it!

I highly recommend.

Chomps

Chomps brand beef sticks are similar in size and style to Slim Jim brand jerky sticks, but they are a bite more tender and less grainy. A nicer quality. My wife picked these up for me as a gift, and I liked them.

“Cracked Pepper & Sea Salt” (venison) and “Hoppin Jalepeno” (grass fed beef) were my favorite flavors.

Worth a shot!

Death Wish Coffee

I’m not a huge coffee drinker. I prefer espresso when I look for my coffee fix – typically in the morning after a run. Death Wish, claiming to be the strongest whole bean coffee on the market, seemed like a natural segway for me from the strength of espresso.

I liked it. My wife’s uncle made it for me in a French press, and it was nice. Not over-the-top strong just for the sake of caffeine, not bitter, and it had a nice flavor that wasn’t overwhelming. I’d love to try it in a ristretto form as a shot of thick, potent espresso.