I haven’t written up a product review in a while. I suppose this shit falls more into the “service” category than the product category, but fuck it. It works, I guess, and I’m not about to make another goddamn separate page of reviews on my website that’s dedicated to “services” in the food world.

Any-fucking-way, a food buddy of mine, @NYCFoodFOMO, won an Instagram contest for a free private dinner prepared by a chef through CookUnity, a service that provides a chef that comes to peoples’ apartments and cooks a meal for them and their guests.

My buddy picked a crew of five more food fanatics, which included me, to eat the CookUnity contest prize meal. As you can see from the Boomerang clip below, this was right after I had just gazed into Medusa’s eyes.

Our chef, Isaac Friedman, did a great job with the meal, and we noticed that he even did the dishes before he left! Pretty sweet.

So we started with a Spanish mac and cheese, which was filled with chorizo, roasted piquillo peppers, caramelized vidalia onions and smoked paprika.

This shit was pretty killer. It was so good that I considered lathering my balls with the warm leftovers toward the end of the meal, but I thought that might be weird for Isaac to experience. The other guys probably would have been okay with it, though. Especially since they were totally comfortable taking pictures at weird, semi-erotic angles and in sexually suggestive positions.

Speaking of the other guys (@StuffBenEats, @FoodAndCity, @FoodMento, and my cousin PJ), I think we all found this mac to be our favorite course of the meal. With those ingredients, I half expected it to be too salty, but it wasn’t. The flavors were nice and smoky from the chorizo and paprika, with a pop of heat and great creamy cheese (several styles involved, including cheddar and jack).

For the main course we had Israeli style chicken schnitzel. This was served with a pilaf of mujaddara rice, beluga lentils and caramelized onions. There was also a marinated heirloom tomato salad and a delicious green herb tahini sauce.

The chicken stayed very tender, and the outer breading was perfectly crisp. The sweet and savory sauce added an interesting flavor element that tied the chicken in nicely with the sides. If you’re a man who loves chicken, then this dish is for you. And if you’re a man who loves making love to chicken, then all-star news anchor Ernie Anastos will tell you what to do:

Dessert was a cardamom spiced rice pudding, topped with toasted pistachios and a pomegranate-cherry reduction.

I was never a big fan of rice pudding, but I think now I’m a changed man. This was really fucking good! The cardamom and pistachio combo gave it a distinctly near-eastern flavor profile, and we were all raving about the sweet and tart cherry-pomegranate reduction sauce that was drizzled on top.

In sum, this is a pretty cool service. If this is in your budget (I have no idea what the pricing is like), and you don’t really have time to cook at home for your family, then this seems like a good solution.