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Long Island, NY Strip, Restaurant Week, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

Tellers (Long Island)

September 18, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Tellers overall score: 88

First I’d like to thank Jeff and Elizabeth for the gift card, which totally overcompensated me for the time I spent taking and editing photos of their son Jack. Tellers, formerly a bank, is a unique steakhouse in Islip, Long Island, well known for its quality and ambiance. This marks my second trip to the restaurant. I ate like a ravenous beast this time ’round, and I may fall into a deep food coma at any moment. Must type fast. See below. Third visit remarks in italics.

Flavor: 8

Tellers is good. I feel like it can be great, however. Although cooked properly in terms of doneness, I think the meat was slightly under seasoned, and the steak was not allowed to rest long enough before serving; the large pool of juices in the plate ruined some of the crisp textural components you like with a steak. For the size steak I had, I can see, however, that it would be difficult to ensure even flavoring throughout the thickness of the meat. The first time I went, I got the delmonico, which is the smaller, boneless ribeye that was included in the restaurant week prix fix (see price section below). The second time I went, I got the dry-aged 39oz bone-in ribeye; a much thicker cut (all bow to my manliness). It had some gristle, but the intra-muscular fat was good quality. I’d definitely eat here again, but this is certainly not the best steak in terms of flavor. I’ve seen average places with average quality cuts of beef do more with less. On a third trip I had the strip steak (16oz, boneless). It was still a bit under seasoned, but the crust was MUCH better, and there was pretty much NO bleed out. I ordered medium rare. it came back a bit over and slightly uneven, but still very tasty, so I didn’t mind so much.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 9

Tellers offers several different cuts and several versions of each cut. There are two sized filets, as well as a Wellington preparation, a bacon wrapped filet, and a bone-in filet. They offer a boneless delmonico ribeye, as well as 21 day dry-aged NY strips (boneless), ribeyes (bone-in) and porterhouses for one or two. Additionally, they have skirt steak and other meats like lamb. On special the second time I went was a Wagyu porterhouse for two. This covers the essential four cuts, and then offers some variation and choice. Nicely done, Tellers, although I got a good look at the porterhouse steak for one, and, to be honest, it looked more like a T-bone since the filet side was quite skimpy. CAREFUL! A carnivore connoisseur like me may have sent that shit back.

Portion Size & Plating: 9

Portion sizes ranged from average to large here. The filets are 8oz (average for smaller cuts), 14oz (larger than average for regular cuts), and 14oz for the bone-in (average, given the weight of the bone included). The delmonico is about 20oz, the strip is about 16oz, and the ribeye… wait for it… is fucking 39oz. Yeah that’s right… And I ate all of that mother fucker. Suck it, you peons.

Price: 8

The first time I went to Tellers they were offering a $50 three course prix fix dinner that included wine pairings with each course; AMAZING DEAL. That was during Long Islands’s restaurant week, but Tellers regularly offers a $45 three course prix fix every Sunday and for early dining during the week (no wine included). These are seriously great deals, since it includes the boneless delmonico (if you choose the steak item). On my second trip, I had a $200 gift card in my pocket thanks to Jeff and Elizabeth. Weighing the option to use it twice on two prix fix dinners versus going all out on the regular menu, I ultimately decided to go all out to get the full experience that Tellers has to offer (since last time I did a prix fix). Our bill came to $185 (scallop app, dozen oysters, creamed spinach, 39oz ribeye, seared tuna, trio of pies, martini, and espresso), so the gift card covered everything, and then we added an additional $15 or so on the table above the $200, for a grand total of $215. As you can see, regular menu prices are a bit steep as compared to the prix fix deals for the increase in quality and portion size (I’d say flavor is about the same between prix fix items and regular menu items). If/when I go back, I will likely stick to the prix fix, since I know now that it offers the most bang for the buck. Take advantage of this expert knowledge, assholes. HEED! Below is the bill for the third visit:

Bar: 9

Tellers has a very nice bar and lounge off of the main dining room which you can access from the rear parking lot to bypass the main entryway. The full menu is available here, which is great if you ever try to go and the dining room is all booked up. Teller’s has an extensive wine list, and they make a good martini to boot (though mine was a little warm when it was first served to me). It is a cool place to hang out even if you aren’t eating. The bar itself is nice, and there is a great selection of booze, especially after dinner-type swanky drinks (several types of armagnac, grappa, single malt scotches, madiera, ports, and brandy).

Specials and Other Meats: 8

Slim on alternative meats, Tellers offers just the lamb and roasted chicken. No shame in that; the red meat is the reason why you go here. As mentioned earlier, they offered a Wagyu porterhouse for two, which gets good marks in my book as far as specials are concerned. The Wagyu was the only item off menu offered as a special, however.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9

The duck fat french fries are delicious, and they came FREE as we awaited our appetizers. They’re served with a really nice homemade ketchup and mustard/mayo dipping sauce on the side. Perfectly seasoned and crispy. I ordered a bakers dozen oysters. For a moment I was torn between those and little necks, but I went with the oysters. In hindsight I should have gotten a half-dozen of each to try them all out, but I was extremely pleased with the oysters. Cold, clean, fresh, creamy, smooth, and well-shucked. They shucked the shit out of those things. My wife ordered a seared scallops & mushrooms appetizer; perfectly cooked and buttery sweet. Tellers also offers a “trainwreck” potato dish, which is essentially baked potatos scooped out into a cassarole dish and cooked with several types of fine cheeses, bacon and peppers. That will fill you right up. Speaking of filling, the creamed spinach is huge; it can easily feed four people. It is not super creamy (I don’t like it overly creamy), and it is your basic quality creamed spinach; it gets the job done. For dessert, we had a trio of pies in a jar, which was fun and interesting, though extremely HOT. They were very sweet as well, and could have benefitted from a scoop of vanilla ice cream alongside to cut both the heat and the sweet. Luckily I didn’t burn my mouth this time like I did at Dylan Prime though. On our first visit here, we ordered the calamari, which were nicely breaded and crispy, but lacked seasoning/salt. The fries were also free then as well, and before dessert they brought us a small plate of home made cookies (they didn’t do that on our second visit). On the third visit, we tried the peppered bacon, the crab cakes, the brussels sprouts, and the hazelnut cheesecake. The bacon was thick – almost an inch. It was cooked in a braised fashion, soft and tender, and covered with a horseradishy BBQ type sauce. The crab cakes were a bit on the small side for the price ($17) but they were juicy, lumpy, and crispy without being too bready – and served with a yummy hollandaise sauce. The brussels sprouts were nothing to write home about. I make much better sprouts at home. I like a little crisp to mine, and there was no crisp on these. Also not enough pancetta. The hazelnut cheesecake was rich and tasty, and had a tangy smear of nutty chocolate poo beside it. See pics below:

Seafood Selection: 9

There is a great selection of seafood at Tellers. Crispy skin salmon, swordfish steak, seared tuna, lobster, stuffed flounder with crab, fresh clams and oysters, sashimi, scallops, seafood towers, and shrimp tossed with assorted seafood in pasta. If you can’t take the meat, no need to start bitchin’ – order up some seafood. They do it well here. We really enjoyed the oysters and scallop appetizers, and my wife was happy with her seared tuna. FYI – my wife is not an asshole pussy (asspussy) because she ordered fish at a steakhouse. She recently had her Charles-De-Gallbladder removed and red meats are just not sitting well with her at the moment. On the third visit my wife had the millenium lobster (2lb). It was served with very nice, creamy, super-whipped mashed potatoes. The lobster was de-shelled already when it came to the table, and topped with a spicy butter sauce. See below for the nice presentation:

Service: 9

The service here is impeccable. First, you are greeted with a lovely potato foccacia bread. It is FANTASTIC; buttery, sweet and savory, almost like a corn bread. Our attentive waiter explained and described everything to us; from how things were prepared to what they were cooked with. And I mean everything, including the foccacia, fries, steaks, apetizers – these guys really take pride in what they do, they learn the menu, and they understand the culinary arts (especially meat). The waiters all wear a formal shirt and tie, but there are women as well as men in the waitstaff. Big points on service for Tellers. We never waited on water, the check came promptly, and everything was done at a good, comfortable pace. Tellers will also go out of their way to bring something speial to the table if they know it is your birthday or anniversary. On the third trip we noticed that they no longer bring free french fries and the fresh baked pan bread to the table. That kinda sucks, since those items were almost the best part of the meal. However, we did have a great waiter named Billy, who was helpful, knowledgeable, and genuine. Top notch.

Ambiance: 10

Tellers used to be an old bank, hence the name. The main dining room sports a triple high ceiling with beautiful architecture and long, tall, elegant windows that seem to have been preserved with as much historical accuracy as possible. Seating is also available in the bar/lounge area. The old bank vault, which still has the gate and huge vault door attached, now houses a wine cellar. Bins of wine also adorn the main lobby. Very classy. It is a beautiful restaurant. There is no music in the main dining room, but you can hear it slightly, coming from the bar area. Tables are ALMOST too close, but not uncomfortable. Tellers is not a huge restaurant so they have to do what they can. The corner booths are roomy and spacious, however. Bathrooms are large and clean, and have nice thick disposable paper towels. Once in a while during the meal you might feel a slight breeze gently carry through the dining room since it has a high ceiling and there are large doors near the entryway that let the wind in when both sets of doors are opened at the same time. Two large, fake trees sit in decorative cauldrons in the dining room, giving the room an outdoors feel, especially when you look out the windows to see the uplighting on the real trees outside on the well manicured grounds. Tellers is a very pleasing and unique place to eat.

Just as a post-script, I thought I was eating a lot until I saw the couple at a neighboring table order the trainwreck potato dish, creamed spinach, and the lobster mac & cheese – all this along with their free fries, foccacia bread, porterhouse for one and seared tuna (HOLY FUCKING STARCH BATMAN). I wonder if they finished it all. That is pretty badass if they did.

UPDATE 9/13/15

I came back here for a meal after running in the inaugural Suffolk County Marathon. I burned about 3400 calories in that, my first marathon, so I was ready to pack on some fat. This joint offers a $45 price fix Sunday meal that includes some great shit. For example, my massive slab bacon app as a starter:

Mine was perfect! My mom’s, hover, was very fatty and not as pleasant.

For the main course I had an 18oz delmonico (boneless) rib eye. Mine was cooked somewhere in the range of medium rare to medium (I ordered medium rare). My dad’s was unfortunately overcooked to medium well (he, too, ordered medium rare).

Dessert comes with the meal as well, but before that I should mention the duck fat french fries and burnt broccoli that we shared among the table:

Both had great crisp texture. The fries didn’t taste heavily of duck fat, but they were pretty much perfect french fries. The broccoli was super tasty. They are steamed and then flash fried for that crisp.

For dessert I needed something light. My body was not agreeing with this additional pounding I was putting it through after the race. I went with a trio of sorbets.

I was amazed to see a cigar menu on the dessert menu. Odd, considering that smoking is not allowed in the establishment. However the restaurant has some nice outdoor lounge seating. So on a nice night you can puff away out there:

As for drinks: I recommend the St. Germain and candied hibiscus martini. Really awesome, and you can eat the flower. Yes – this was my wife’s drink… Do I look like a fucking pussy to you?

TELLER’S
605 Main St.
Islip, NY 11751

Burgers, Flash Deals, Midtown East, NY Strip, Other Cuts, Porterhouse, Press Reviews, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

Charlie Palmer Steak

August 7, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Charlie Palmer Steak overall score: 89

NOTE: This joint has MOVED locations.

My wife read an article about Charlie Palmer’s new steakhouse opening up at the old Rothman’s location. They were offering a 15% off promotion since it was their soft opening, so we jumped on it. My wife also made mention that we were celebrating a birthday on her OpenTable reservation (this will be important later).

Flavor: 9
We had two cuts of steak: the bone-on rib eye, and the teres major. I had never heard of that cut before. Apparently it is off the shoulder area, and is tender like a filet. To me, it was somewhere in between a hanger and a filet in flavor. It had a great char on the outside and was cooked perfectly medium rare on the inside.

The rib eye was really nice. Also perfectly cooked, and very juicy with only a little bit of bleed out going on. My only gripe is that I think the rib eye needed some more seasoning. I found myself dipping into the sauces too often for a boost of flavor, but the sauces were very good (see below).

Here’s a shot of the bernaise sauce, though I think I enjoyed the horseradish cream and the Charlie Palmer signature steak sauces a little better:

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 10
This place has a really big selection of cuts. See below:

I was excited to see stuff that I had never heard of before, so that’s a big win for this joint. Also the presence of high end meats makes for a dynamic dining experience: you can always come back and try something new each visit.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions here are average. I know the trend is “bigger is better,” but that’s not always the case. At least here you know you are getting great quality. The plating is pretty nice too, which you will see in the shots below.

Price: 10
This score is subjective, I know, because we got an incredible 15% off promotion, AND our waiter, Charles, took a few items like sides and desserts off the bill because we were celebrating a birthday. That was pretty awesome. Had we not had those benefits, I may have scored this an 8 or possibly even a 7. Prices are really starting to skyrocket these days. I know rent is high, but it may start to turn diners away when they see a steak for almost $60.

Bar: 9
The new modern bar is nice. It’s got a direct line of sight to the street, through large windows that open like shutters, so that’s cool. It is definitely going to be a vibrant lunch and after work spot in midtown, especially since they kept the magnanimous bar tender Mike from the old Rothman’s. He’s somewhat of a famous cat in there.

The drinks were really nice too. My martini was mixed perfectly, and the “Doctor’s Note” was absolutely delicious with the Laphroaig added in there for smoke.

Specials and Other Meats: 8
There were no specials read to us at the table, so not sure if this will be something they plan to add once the main opening happens. Otherwise, they do have a nice selection of other meats to choose from aside from beef. As a side note here, they do offer a seven course tasting menu that looks out of this world.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9
We started with the chicken liver and fois gras pate, which was creamy and rich, yet not heavy at all. The fig jam that it came with was delicious, with healthy chunks of the fruit within:

Next was the yellowtail sashimi served up on a salt rock. Very nice and fresh, with a touch of herbiness:

We shared a shellfish platter for one ($38). It came with two each of crab claws, oysters, clams, and shrimp, with a half a lobster tail and a single lobster claw. Not bad, but I felt the clams were not that great (may have been a larger variety than Little Necks), and the amount of shellfish was a bit lacking for almost $40, though probably fine for one person I suppose.

On the side we had a nice variety of items. First was grilled oyster mushrooms. These were meaty and earthy. Very nice:

Then we had a truffle twice baked potato. This was the star of the show. It was like mashed potato mixed with cheese and truffles and then put back into the baked potato carcass. Really good shit.

Then we tried the Jersey corn. Nothing special here but it was very tasty and fresh, and nicely seasoned.

For desert we had two items: a cheesecake pudding, which was fucking delicious. Lighter than a cheesecake and really silky smooth, with graham cracker crumble on top.

The other was a blueberry and raspberry cobbler with a scoop of vanilla ice cream on top. This was heart warming and comforting.

Seafood Selection: 8
There’s a great deal of seafood on the menu. We only got to try the shellfish platter, so I can’t really judge this category based on only that item. Next visit.

Service: 10
Charles, our waiter, was amazing. He had some nice suggestions for us, and he was really nice. I was really shocked that he had some items taken off of our bill because we were celebrating a birthday. Total class act! I hope you readers are fortunate enough to have him as your waiter if you decide to go.

A few other mentions here: the table bread was really good. Three different types of bread in a sack. One was a sliced dinner roll, another was a really tasty and crispy-crusted Italian bread, and the last was a potato and onion roll that had actual pieces of potato and onion in the bread.

Ambiance: 8
They’ve made a good improvement on the old Rothman’s decor. Although I tend to prefer traditional over modern, the modern they chose for here is toned down and elegant. Take a look:

There’s even a small private dining area in the back:

And the cutlery is pretty cool looking, and felt really natural in your hands:

SECOND TRIP UPDATE

On a second trip, my wife and I noticed that they changed up the decor a bit (those ball lights were replaced, and the private room got a make over). Still a similar vibe though. Charles is unfortunately no longer working there. Bummer! But hopefully he is on to bigger and better things.

We used a Gilt City deal that got us an app, a porterhouse for two, a side, a glass of wine each, and a signed cookbook. My wife, of course, got that at a heavy discount as well, so I think our entire meal with all the perks cost her like $15 less than the porterhouse itself.

To start, we got this awesome thick slab pork belly/bacon dish that came with a fried quail egg and potato hash, served in a hot skillet. This was probably the best bacon dish I’ve ever tried. Sticky, crispy, meaty, fatty and packed with flavor.

We also tried the Alaskan king crabcake with fried green tomatoes and corn relish. This was really tasty, and it reminded me of a similar dish we had at Minton’s. The tomato added a nice zingy tart punch.

At first bite, I thought the porterhouse was a bit under seasoned, but the dish was served with a bowl of freshly shaved sea salt for you to flavor to taste. Excellent! Check out the beautiful presentation of this steak. I usually hate the “sizzling platter” for a steak, because I worry about the steak continuing to cook while it sits in the skillet. But nothing got messed up here, as you can see from the perfect medium rare cooking temp.

On the side we had the truffle mac & cheese. We were excited about it because the truffle baked potato was so good last time, but this ultimately fell flat. The pasta tasted grainy and watered down. The cheese sauce lacked punch, and the truffle was more aroma than flavor. I would have likely ordered those oyster mushrooms again from above, but they were no longer offered on the menu.

For dessert we shared what was probably the best carrot cake we have ever tasted. It was moist and flavorful without being overly rich. So good.

A nice bonus was being able to meet Chef Ryan Lory, who I have been following on Instagram for a while now. I encourage you to do the same – his food pics are really awesome, and most of his shots are what he is whipping up for the tasting menu in the kitchen at the steakhouse. Check him out below, getting some tourist love:

THIRD TRIP UPDATE 6/25/17

I was recently invited into Charlie Palmer to help influence for their new 50/50 burger, which is a grind that’s half bacon and half beef. It’s available on Fridays for 50% off through Labor Day.

I have to say, I really liked this burger. Honestly, it didn’t look like much coming out, and I was skeptical of the grind for various reasons (can’t cook bacon – even Neuskes, which is what they use – to medium rare and hope for a good texture). But this thing was majorly good.

It had the sear quality of a steak on the patty, and it was cooked nicely to medium rare all the way though. No rubbery bacon content, and you got that smokey sweetness without it being overboard for the sake of “baconness.”

The fries are really something special too. Somewhere in between regular thickness and potato sticks – shoestring, if you will. Beautifully cooked and nicely seasoned.

Martini game is still on point.

And this time I tried a bolognese tagliatelle pasta dish that was really rich and flavorful. Nicely prepared.

As for the steaks, this time I tried a bone-in strip steak.

A solid 8/10 for flavor. Wonderful ashy char on the outside and nice temperature inside.

Asparagus was good.

Really enjoyed the tomato-based steak sauce with the mashed potatoes.

Olive oil cake dessert was a bit dry in parts but still flavorful.

I was bummed out to see that their oyster mushroom side was no longer offered, and neither was the terres major or the rib eye for one. On the bright side, we did get to meet Charlie Palmer himself. Such a nice man, extremely hand-on and talented.

OLD ADDRESS:
CHARLIE PALMER STEAK
5 E 54th St
New York, NY 10022

NEW ADDRESS:
Archer Hotel New York
47 W 38th St
New York, NY 10018

Flash Deals, Midtown West, Porterhouse, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

The Statler Grill

July 27, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

The Statler Grill overall score: 73

Groupon recently had a sweet steakhouse deal: $49 steak dinner for two that covers $18 worth of apps, $114 worth of steak, and $18 worth of sides. That’s a steal! It turns out the restaurant was The Statler Grill, a joint I had wandered past a few times near Penn Station and always wondered about.

Flavor: 8

I had the ribeye, which was partially boneless at about 22oz. Nice and flavorful, cooked perfectly through the whole way, nothing uneven, nice and tender and juicy, well seasoned, well rested… It didn’t need anything, yet there was just something missing that I couldn’t put my finger on; maybe it was the atmosphere (see below)? Whatever it was I couldn’t give it the full 10. My wife got the lamb chops, which were amazing; nice crust, not too gamey, but full of great flavor.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 7

The menu has the basics: strip, filet, ribeye, and porterhouse. All seem to be prime quality. No specials, but they did have lamb chops and a veal chop to mix it up.

Portion Size & Plating: 7

We were full, so the size was good; I estimate the ribeye to be about 20-24oz (there were no numbers on the menu), and about 3-4oz for each lamb chop (with six chops per order). Plating is basic; white plate with meat + a little green garnish. Nothing fancy.

Price: 8

I wanted to give this place a 9 or 10 for price, since we paid so little for our meal, but the menu prices were high for dining without a sweet groupon. The ribeye was $54, lamb chops $48. Kinda pricey for a place like this. The lobster cocktail was $18, and the smallish sides were $9 each. If the atmosphere was a little different (see below) if might be worth it at full price, because the food WAS cooked properly and tasted great… but for that price, head over to Keen’s, Wolfgang’s or Delmonico’s for serious atmosphere. That said, our meal, with drink, tax and tip included, was $42 over the initial $49 I paid for the groupon.

Bar: 6

The bar is kinda small and junky. It probably gets some customers who are awaiting their LIRR train, so it’s not empty. They do offer some interesting beers and wine selections, and their martini was made properly, but this isn’t really the kind of bar I’d want to hang at for too long. Contrast with Delmonico’s or Keen’s and you see what I mean.

Specials and Other Meats: 6

No specials! That’s fine; after all, it is a steak joint. The basic cuts are all that is required. Other than that they had veal and lamb, a good deal of seafood and chicken as well, for the wimps.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8

We started with the lobster cocktail; nicely cooked, accompanied by some dipping sauces: a kicked up, horseradishy cocktail sauce, and a spicy mayo type sauce. The lobster was split in two long ways to split the tail meat, and the claws were pre-cracked and ready to devour. The creamed spinach was certainly creamy. What it lacked in salt and savory it made up for in cream, so it served as a good cut to the well-seasoned meat. I found myself dipping fork fulls of meat into the spinach with every few bites. Only bad thing: the size was a bit small. The order of fries was good too; crispy ribbons, well salted. About two potatoes worth, so also a bit pricey for $9. We skipped dessert. If I was still hungry, I probably would have rounded off the meal with some oysters. One thing looked particularly interesting on the menu: the Dr. Olsen Salad – basically a cobb with a seafood twist.

Seafood Selection: 8

Chilean sea bass, grilled salmon, shrimp scampi, crab cakes, and seared sesame tuna graced the seafood menu. That covers most bases, though there was no lobster aside from the cocktail. They also offered oysters AND clams on the half shell as apps (oreganata clams too – and nice move offering both clams and oysters), as well as fried calamari, shrimp cocktail, lump crab meat, and app sized portions of scampi, crabcakes and tuna.

Service: 9

Our waiter was really friendly and outgoing to all his tables – an older man – and the waiters were dressed in the classic shirt & tie manner. Crusty bread was hot when it came to the table, and served with a nice basic whipped butter that wasn’t cold and solid.

Ambiance: 6

This place could use a makeover. It is not BAD inside, but it doesn’t have a steakhouse feel (see Lugers) OR a fine dining feel (see Mark Joseph). It feels more like a Heartland Brewery, yet at least in Heartland Brewery you know you have a kickass bar/beer/drink selection. The floors are nice; dark wood, Ceilings are high with the exposed warehouse look, and tables are what you would see in any regular restaurant. Walls are covered with random stuff like trumpets, artwork, etc. I think they need a new space, or a new decor. Even the doorway seemed cheap; more like a bar door or a standard storefront shop. It could be the location – it is directly across from MSG and Penn Station, down 33rd street about halfway to 6th Avenue, so it lacks a certain character or uniqueness trait. The bathrooms, cleverly marked “Joseph” and “Josephine” for men/women, were standard bar bathrooms – not dirty, but not the kind you expect in a fine steakhouse.

UPDATE AS OF 7/27/15

So Statler Grill now has a different deal, and it isn’t quite as awesome as it used to be. It’s still a good deal, don’t get me wrong, but you need to know up front that the menu is very limited. There are only two cuts of steak available in the “steak dinner for two” Groupon deal. You can either choose a strip/sirloin, or the porterhouse for two. They also limit you on your selection of apps, they choose the sides for you, and you are limited to two desserts. The good thing is that you can swap wine for beer or cocktails with no extra charge. Anything else that you might want to swap will cost you big time. Like $15 extra if you want a filet instead of the strip. Or $5 extra if you want chocolate ice cream instead of cheesecake or bread pudding. Some of the substitution fees are ridiculous considering that the actual menu prices are the same if not less for the substitutions.

Anyway, the deal is $99 for two apps, two entrees, two desserts, two coffees and a bottle of wine. It’s really not that bad of a deal if you happen to want what is on the limited menu. So I stress that you look before you leap.

We had the caesar salad and friend calamari to start. Both were small portions. I’d say half size from what you might expect.

We went with the porterhouse for two. Although it was a bit light on the ounces and seasoning, I didn’t mind so much because it was cooked properly and the flavor was decent, though not as good as last time I came (maybe 7/10 for this porterhouse).

The sides were both excellent, and were generously portioned given the deal.

Since the manager was aware that we were a bit unhappy with the Groupon fine print, he went out of his way to make sure we were happy come dessert time. He gave us the chocolate ice cream substitution for free, and also threw in a creme brûlée on the house. Good man.

The real star of the show at dessert time was the bread pudding, though. It was awesome. It tasted like warm fluffy French toast cookie dough.

That about does it. Overall the meal was satisfying and we liked our food. We were just a little let down over the seemingly deceptive wording in the Groupon ad. Hopefully this gets rectified in the future, so that others don’t get let down upon ordering time. We were actually going to leave and eat elsewhere when we learned that the deal was not what we expected, but we were told that the Groupon had already been redeemed. Essentially that meant we were stuck eating there or else face a loss of the Groupon value.

STATLER GRILL
136 W. 33rd St.
New York, NY 10001

Burgers, Midtown West, Porterhouse, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

NYY Steak

July 19, 2015 Johnny Prime 6 Comments

NYY Steak overall score: 85

NOTE: THIS PLACE IS CLOSED

Ever since moving back to NYC, my dad and I have been talking about hitting the relatively new New York Yankees Steakhouse in midtown. We were finally able to set up a visit (they’re only open on weekends during dinner hours, and my parents usually visit during lunch hours on weekends, so we had to reassess the normal visit routine). So my parents came in with my oldest nephew. It was hotter than Derek Jeter’s balls in a Phoenix double header that day. My wife, my parents, my nephew and I were all sweating our asses off. We were walking around Central Park in the lead up to the reservation when out of nowhere it began to pour. Rain was coming down hard, as if Poseidon and Zeus were having a golden shower party in the sky. We ran out of the park and, lucky for us, a bus was heading down 5th Avenue just as we exited. The bus let us off just around the corner from the restaurant, where we were finally safe from the downpour. Check out the count below:

Flavor: 8
I ordered the 27oz long bone rib eye. It was perfectly cooked, nice and juicy, tender, and didn’t have too much inedible gristle on it. However I felt like it was just a hair under-seasoned. Nothing worth complaining about in the slightest. The most awesome part about the steak, for me, was the custom etching of your name into the bone. Upon taking our order, Michael, our awesome waiter, asked my father and I what text we wanted etched into our rib bones. WHAAAT?!??!!! THIS IS AWESOME!!! Check it out!!! This shit is now on my (Mickey) mantel at home.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 7
You have all your major cuts here. Filet, strip, porterhouse and the rib eye. Everything on the menu is prime and aged in house. When you head downstairs you can actually see the meat man carving up cuts and trimming the meat into portions.

Portion Size & Plating: 10
Portions here are massive. Aside from the steaks, whatever else you order is a very generous size. You’ll see what I’m talking about below for some of the items pictured. In addition, the plating is really clever. The bread plates are in the shape of a baseball field, and each dinner plate has the unique jersey number of a famous player (7 for Mantle, 9 for Maris/Nettles, etc).

Price: 8
The cost is a bit on the high end, but this is to be expected in a place that dons the Yankee brand and that is located in such a big, beautiful space in costly midtown. The really good thing here is that you get a LOT for your money – well worth the cost, in my opinion, and very good quality food.

Bar: 7
The bar is nice and sleek, with a few television screens broadcasting baseball games, as you might expect at a Yankees steakhouse. They mixed a nice martini too, which is always important to me.

Specials and Other Meats: 9
There is a really amazing $42 price fix special here. You get your choice of salad or the bacon app to start, then a choice between a 6oz filet (you can upgrade to 8oz), chicken, or salmon, composed as a plate with mashed potatoes and broccolini. Well done NYY! Broccolini is a personal favorite of mine, so I was glad to see that on the menu. Here is a shot of the bacon app and salad (a few people ordered this at the table). The bacon app is actually a half order of the normal sized app. Still generous in my opinion.

Other than this, they basically feature an on-menu steak of the day that the chef recommends for whatever reason.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9
We selected a few apps from the main menu. My dad and I had the lump blue crab. I was expecting a portion half this size, and with crappy meat, but this was AMAZING. The meat was tender and juicy, and served with a little salad on top and some croutons, cucumber and tomatoes. Delicious.

We also had french fries. These were great too – very crispy and really well seasoned with some parmesan cheese and coarse salt. For some reason I forgot to snap a photo of these beauties. My sincere apologies. But I did get a shot of the amazing chocolate chip cookie ice cream sandwich with a fucking chocolate Yoohoo shake. LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THIS FOR ONLY $16!!! And it was GOD DAMNED DELICIOUS!

OH YEAH! We also had this freaking thing: a 151 rum flamed ice cream volcano. Yes. Ice cream was beneath the flames and caramelized coating. So cool.

Seafood Selection: 8
My wife had the salmon with her price fix meal. It was really nicely cooked to medium rare as she requested. Mild, but very flavorful. Based on this I would definitely come and try some of their other seafood offerings.

Service: 10
As I mentioned above, Michael was a great waiter. He was helpful, he knew his meat, and had great suggestions for us. When I made the reservation, I randomly put “congratulations Jeremy” in the text box on Open Table. I guess they pay attention to those things, because they printed up a special menu with my nephew’s name on it saying congrats.

A few other service notes: the manager was very generous and offered us some after dinner drinks on the house. Port, Sambuca, and cognac. This was incredible! We were blown away by the service.

Another item worth mentioning was the bread. They offer a cheese bread roll with olive spread, and a pretzel bread roll with mustard butter. Very tasty stuff. And last, a trio of salts/peppers was presented to us as well. A himalayan pink salt, a fluffy sea salt, and a pepper from Madagascar that was pretty spicy for peppercorn.

Ambiance: 9
The space is really neat here. It used to be a bank. They have some private dining rooms on the ground floor with a converted vault as one of the private rooms. They have a big, high ceiling open room with two levels on the main floor, featuring larger-than-life sized photos of the great Yankees from the beginning on up through today. Last, there’s a 100-seat room on the upper floor, which features more memorabilia and some smaller framed items. Not only this, but the waiters are all wearing pinstripes beneath their vests and ties in honor of the greatest baseball team ever. The menu even reflects this greatness, with 27 wines by the glass to go with the Yanks’ 27 championship victories. Nice touch.

Beside the bar I noticed a cool feature: steak knives with MVP names on them: many are players, but some are honored guests and frequent diners. Pretty cool.

POWER LUNCH!

For $27 you get a salad, your choice of burger, chicken sandwich, or salmon (7oz), and dessert choice of cheesecake or creme brûlée. Awesome deal. The burger was pretty good, though the bun didn’t quite hold up to the immensity of the meat. Fries were perfect – nice and golden brown. Salad was basic and refreshing, and the creme brûlée, though served with a fork, was right on the money – creamy smooth and really bright.

On a third trip, my wife and I came in to take advantage of a free baseball hat and free Yankees tickets promotion that NYY was doing. Each diner gets a hat, and you get a voucher for Yankees tickets, which you can turn in at the stadium box office for tickets.

So we tried the steak tartare and tuna tartare as apps. Both were awesome. The steak was hand cut, but very soft and tender. Really nice flavor. The tuna was thickly chopped on a base of avocado and served with sesame rice chips and sesame oil for a distinctly asian flavor profile that was very refreshing.

For our main course we split the porterhouse for two (38oz). It was overcooked on the edges, but the coarse salt and pepper gave it a nice crust and flavor. The filet side was super tender, but the strip side was a bit tough in parts, and also overly charred, which gave some bites a burnt, ashy flavor.

On the side we had the mac and cheese. This was a spiral pasta with a variety of non-traditional cheeses. It was okay, but a little too funky for my liking. I’m more of a cheddar type of guy when it comes to mac and cheese.

We skipped dessert this time, but I noticed that they no longer offered the chipwich or the ice cream lava mountain that we had on the first trip. Bummer. I also noticed that the three-course price fix was no longer offered, and there was no booze cart that came around at dessert time. Hmm. I took a few points for this here and there in the updated review.

NYY STEAK
7 W. 51st St.
New York, NY 10019

Brooklyn, Other Cuts, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

Saint Anselm

June 13, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Saint Anselm overall score: 77

This small Williamsburg joint has gotten wildly popular among meat aficionados on a budget, due to their highly affordable $17 hanger steak. See how it stacks up below.

Flavor: 8
This was a tough one. My wife and I came here with a friend of ours, so we ordered an “axe handle” rib eye and the well-known hanger steak, to give it all a try. As it turns out, the axe handle was about a six or seven in flavor, but the hanger steak was a nine. So I split the baby here with an eight. The hanger was simply prepared. Salt, pepper, butter and grilled like a mo-fo. It was perfectly medium rare, super juicy and tender.

The rib eye was a bit overcooked. We ordered medium rare, but it was more like medium to medium well. The flavor was good, nicely seasoned, and not much waste or fat at all. There wasn’t much in the way of fat cap, but the eye was tasty. The main loss of points here was due to improper cooking.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 6
This place only offers strip, hanger and rib eye. Lack of a filet or porterhouse really cut into the point score here, but the hanger is an excellent and welcome addition to the repertoire.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions here are pretty substantial. the hanger steak is definitely good enough to fill someone, with a side item or app. The rib eye is served in sizes of 39oz, 47oz, and upwards to giganto-portions. We went with 39oz.

Price: 9
The apps and the hanger are nicely priced, but the rib eye is a bit overpriced in comparison to the rest of the menu. At $2.70/oz, that comes out to midtown prices or higher. Anyway here’s the full bill. As you can see the other items all seemed pretty reasonable.

Bar: 7
This seems like a great place to hang out. However, I don’t think you’re allowed to sit at the bar unless you are getting food (see “service” comments below). I was a little bummed out by my experience on that angle.

Specials and Other Meats: 8
There were three specials and a substitution menu item (grilled clams were grilled mussels instead, which we actually ordered and enjoyed). They also serve multiple veal, pork, lamb and chicken dishes up in this bitch, so good on them for that!

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
I was saddened to see that the bacon item was no longer offered on the menu, but we still had some decent side items. We started with the grilled mussels ($7). These were fantastic. A simple lemon and butter sauce with some bread for dipping. The flavor was clean and crisp, really nice.

Next we had the sardines. I was glad to see that there were three in the serving, so we could each have our own. These were a little rough to navigate given the tiny bones, but the meat itself was really delicious.

Last, we tried the spinach gratin. The spinach was nice: not overly creamy. It was on the dry side, which I wasn’t sure that I liked at first, but it grew on me. The cheese on top was hard and didn’t really mix into the spinach too well. It was more of a crust on top.

Seafood Selection: 8
There’s just as many fish items as any other type of meat, whether it’s pork, beef, veal or lamb. We didn’t try any (aside from apps), but one of the specials was a salmon head that sounded great, as did the wine braised octopus. I’m not positive, but I think I also heard that this place serves dollar oysters as well. WIN!

Service: 7
When the place first unlocked its doors at 5pm, I walked in alone and said that I would be a group of three. They wouldn’t sit me until everyone arrived. I can somewhat understand that kind of policy, typically when a restaurant is very crowded or only has limited seating. But the place was literally empty. Okay. No big deal. I asked if I could sit at the bar. It was about 90 degrees outside and I was sweating. It was cool inside. I was told that the bar seating is reserved for dining customers. I looked around, shocked. I didn’t see any customers. She said she could check for me if it was okay. I said nah. Fuck it. I will wait outside. That shit just put a bad taste in my mouth. Fucking dead empty and I can’t sit at the bar to wait for my other two party members? I totally would have ordered a drink! Assholes. Anyway our waiter was awesome, and we had absolutely no complaints about the actual service during our dinner. By the way: the bar was still empty halfway through our meal. Toward the end, it was starting to fill up, but still plenty of space for one guy to sit and wait for the rest of his party to arrive.

Ambiance: 8
Despite the fact that this is a small, narrow bar type joint, they’ve really done a great job with what they’ve got. Brick walls, olde tyme sigils and banners all over the walls, etc. Very cool. It’s tough to compete with big budget steakhouses in the ambiance category when you’re a mom and pop type place, but this was one of the better mom and pop joints that I’ve been to.

ST. ANSELM
355 Metropolitan Ave.
Brooklyn, NY 11211

Burgers, Flash Deals, Midtown East, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

BV’s Grill

May 31, 2015 Johnny Prime 4 Comments

BV’s Grill overall score: 84

UPDATE: BV’S GRILL IS NOW CLOSED

I picked up a discounted Groupon for this place. I paid about $60 and got $100 off the bill. Check out the review:

Flavor: 8
The rib eye here was really nicely done. I was almost going to give it a nine here but I decided to go with eight because there was a bit too much scrap on the plate when I was finished. Nicely cooked, well rested, juicy, tender, flavorful and all that good shit. Check it out:

My wife ordered the BV Burger, so I had the rare opportunity to kill two birds with one stone here: burger and steak in the same review.

It was nicely cooked to medium, with a thick slice of lightly grilled white onion on top of the melty cheddar. The bun was soft yet strong, and the meat had a nice beefy flavor. It was definitely above average, and a very good deal for $17 with fries, in my opinion. Here’s the cut:

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 8
You’ve got a decent selection of all the main four cuts, plus some good quality beef going on here. There are some alternative cuts like flank or skirt as well.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions are generous here. My steak was about 22oz, if I had to guess. Plating was pretty basic, not too fancy. The creamed spinach (pictured further below) was definitely enough for three.

Price: 9
My rib eye was still priced in the $40s, so I was happy about that, especially given the overall good quality of the meat. That, plus the Groupon deal, made this a great buy. Here’s our bill:

Bar: 9
This place has a really awesome, spacious bar, and an outdoor patio/dining space that is really nice in the warm weather. They also stock some good quality beer on tap, like Delerium, in the event that you’re not sipping on a martini.

Specials and Other Meats: 8
There were three specials being offered, but none of them were steak. First was a two-for-one shrimp cocktail app (eight pieces instead of four). Second was a fish item, I believe. And third was this incredibly refreshing chilled watermelon soup:

It had a hint of spice to it, along with another fruit flavor – maybe apricot? Delicious way to start the meal.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
I started with this thick slice of bacon. It was nicely cooked – soft inside, crunchy edges, and lots of piggy-flavor, as it was also a smoked applewood variety.

The creamed spinach was the perfect texture. I thought it was the right balance of creamy/cheesy to leaf spinach. It might have needed just a touch more salt, though. Still great.

The french fries that came with my wife’s burger were good and crispy, but they were a bit dry. Nothing special about these babies. They’re just there to fill your gut:

We skipped dessert because we were stuffed, but there were some really enticing items, like chocolate pecan pie and soft serve ice cream (a personal favorite).

Seafood Selection: 9
There’s a ton of seafood on the menu. Lots in the apps/starters, and a fair amount of good quality cuts of fish in the entree section, as well as that special I mentioned up above. Solid showing.

Service: 9
Our waiter was great. He was attentive, fast, and really nice – same with the hosting staff. A great place to eat. The bread basket was pretty good too:

That butter in the middle is soft, whipped and light with great seasoning. I think it is likely made in-house. It’s the best butter I’ve had at a steak joint to date.

Ambiance: 8
I actually love the layout of the place, the decor, and the brightness from the massive windows and open-concept space. I think the only down-side is the location, midtown east. I bet it does really well during the workdays, but is dead on weekends. It’s a shame too because this would be a fantastic location to do some summertime day drinking.

Filet Mignon, Flash Deals, Japanese, Midtown West, Press Reviews, Restaurant Week, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

Tender

May 8, 2015 Johnny Prime 2 Comments

Tender overall score: 77

Tender is a sushi and steak joint in midtown. I recently purchased a Groupon: $49 got me $70 worth of food, though I think I paid less with a coupon code. Anyway, check the review below:

Flavor: 9
I had the rib eye. This thing was damn near perfect. Despite this being a somewhat small sized boneless cut, I only took a single point, and that was because some of the fat was a bit gristled and non-edible. I’m trying to reserve the 10-spot for when I eat every scrap.

The meat was perfectly cooked inside. If I had to guess, I’d say they are using a sous vide machine, because the ONLY part that was not pink was the immediate edges, which had a wet crisp on them. Check out the cut and you’ll see what I mean in the cross-section:

The steak was served with some roasted garlic too, which was really soft and spreadable.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 8
This place has all four of the basic cuts (FRPS – filet, rib eye, porterhouse and strip), however they are only available in one size each. The menu says that the strip is dry-aged and the rib eye is Black Angus, so the quality is good there. There is no other beef available other than a meatloaf entree.

Portion Size & Plating: 7
Portions for the steaks are a bit on the small side. The filet is only 8oz at $38; the strip is 12oz at $54; the Black Angus rib eye is 16oz at $50; and the porterhouse is 40oz at $47/pp, which is $94. Since it is only offered for two, they may as well just say $94 on the menu instead of using the per person cost. I’m uncertain whether you can order it for three and have it be something like a 60oz cut. Plating for the steak was really pretty: a wood tray with a stone inlay plate.

Price: 7
I’m glad we had a Groupon, because I think the sizes of the steaks ran a bit small at this price point. When I saw $54 next to a 12oz strip on the menu, my eyes widened in disbelief. That’s way too high. That said, I think we had a good deal with the Groupon purchase, so I wasn’t cringing when Sir William Price arrived at the table:

Bar: 8
This was a confusing visit. A good portion of the restaurant was shuttered due to a private event, so I think we were seated in the smaller rear area, where they had a secondary bar. I’ll give it the standard score of eight as benefit of the doubt, because I think the bar in the main dining area sits along some nice frontage on 47th Street, and has a full walk-around square of bar seating space.

Specials and Other Meats: 5
The only other meat on the menu was chicken. While this only scores half of the allowed points in this category, I have to give credit to the place for sticking to what the sign says on their establishment, for the most part: steak and sushi. The big let down was that they didn’t offer any specials, especially being nestled in their high-powered midtown location on west 47th Street. When I think of a Japanese steak and sushi joint, high quality specialty items come to mind, like Wagyu/Kobe by the ounce, flash cooked on a hot stone with soy sauce and shiitake mushrooms… or tongue-numbing and deadly blowfish sashimi… or soft, delicate uni… NADA!

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
We has some sushi rolls as starters. They were only six pieces each, instead of eight. But they were really tasty. First was the Pink Panther, which was king crab-based with a soy wrapper and some crunch.

Next was Sunset, which had a bunch of different cuts of raw fish inside and on top. Very fresh and delicate.

We also had some truffle fries. These were perfectly cooked McDonald’s style, with a dusting of parsley and a drizzle of truffle oil. Not too overpowering, but well seasoned. We cleaned out the entire bowl.

Seafood Selection: 9
There’s a fair deal of seafood on the menu, even outside the sushi realm. Salmon, branzino, mussels and black cod, in particular, with a shrimp risotto to boot. I was surprised by some of the Italian-style preparations that were on this menu.

Service: 9
The staff was very attentive, and our water was always filled promptly. The service was quick too. We were in and out within an hour, pretty much. Very nice, considering that we weren’t in the mood for a huge, long dinner.

Ambiance: 7
While I can’t really give a full blown review of the ambiance here, since we were limited to a smaller portion of the restaurant, I can confidently assess the place based on what I saw. The lighting is very dim. Big props to Sony for creating a camera like the Alpha 7S, which is a fucking BEAST in low light situations. The music was somewhat ridiculous: very bad, corny 90’s music. I think Hootie & the Blowfish played at some point, which is funny because I mentioned above that I wanted the blowie special without any mention of the hooters. Okay so too dim, bad music, an awkward video screen displaying a generic, stock image of sushi with the word “sushi” next to it… BUT a very cool hallway that connected to the bathrooms and the adjacent Sanctuary Hotel (lots of Buddha and far eastern/Indian statues – those were cool).

UPDATE 8/7/17

I came back in with the PR company that represents the Sanctuary Hotel in order to promote the restaurant week menu at Tender.

Here are the avocado fries and the spicy tuna roll starters. The avocado fries needed a hit of salt, as well as a better dipping sauce. The spicy tuna roll was fine.

Of the three entrees, the filet mignon is probably the best selection, but that comes at a $6 surcharge. When I was here, they gave me the fill sized filet, but I was under the impression that this is usually smaller for regular restaurant week guests. 8/10.

If paying the additional fee isn’t your speed, then go with the rigatoni bolognese:

The pasta is cooked perfectly, and the sauce is meaty but not too heavy. I liked it.

Last, the branzino.

This was nice, and had a great crisp from the skin and fried lotus root. But after having the same dish at Le Cirque, I was disappointed here. This was half the size at best.

Dessert was decent. TI tried a nice piece of tiaramisu and a sliver of cheesecake, but they also offer creme brûlée.

TENDER
130 W. 47th St.
New York, NY 10036

Burgers, Filet Mignon, Midtown West, Other Cuts, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

Capital Grille (midtown west)

April 8, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Capital Grille (midtown west, NYC) overall score: 84

One of the rising star steakhouse chains, Capital Grille has several locations around the country. This review is for the midtown west location in NYC.

Flavor: 8

Unfortunately, my Delmonico steak came rare despite ordering it medium. The replacement steak was not rested, and when I cut into it, it bled out all over my plate, leaving me with a pool of juice and a feverish struggle to finish before it got dry. The steak also had a bit of inedible fat on it, but it also did have some nice melty yummy fat too. It tasted good, but I had to add salt and pepper because they rushed my replacement and didn’t season it properly. I tasted the filet as well, since my coworker ordered the price fix for ladies (FYI he is not a she), which came with an 8oz filet (no bigger than a good burger). It was perfectly cooked and juicy. So rather than the minus 5 that this place would have gotten for the incredible steak mishap, I added a point back for the filet. Keep in mind that mishap threw off the entire flow of the meal. My coworker had to start eating otherwise his steak would have gotten cold, and I was sitting there poking at the sides while waiting for my unrested, unseasoned $45 steak. Sons of bitches… On a second visit I went for the $39 price fix theater menu’s Kona crusted sirloin, which comes in at 14oz. Not a bad steak for the deal, but I think the 8oz filet tasted better (my buddy got that). Either way the points went up here after the second visit. See pics below (FYI that is shallot butter that they dumped on the meat):

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 8

They have a fair selection here. They offer a filet and a filet oscar for the (!)s of the group (A (!) is a pussy – look at it closely). They have two preparations of sirloin (cognac peppercorn being one, and the other just being regular grilled/broiled), a porterhouse, and a ribeye. The essentials are covered with a little variation, but not enough to live up to other joints in the neighborhood. The ribeye was semi-bone-in. I say that not because it was a half-limp penis, but because there were two very small pieces of bone that were part of the cut. I was a little disappointed, like a woman if she tried to get it on with a guy that had a half flaccid penis instead of a rock-solid longbone.

Portion Size & Plating: 8

The portion sizes are good. My Delmonico was 22oz, and all the other cuts are on par with normal NYC steakhouse sizes.

Price: 8

Martinis were $11 (good); my Delmonico steak was $45 (semi-okay if not for the complete fuck-up of my order); the pussy-ass price fix dinner was a great deal at $39 (Caesar or mixed greens salad, filet or 14oz sirloin, 2 sides and dessert). Otherwise sides were $10; and apps were anywhere from $12 to $17. The total bill for two, including three drinks, was $165 with tax and tip included – not bad. Here is the very reasonable bill from my second visit, when we had the theater menu price fix:

Bar: 9

The bar is great. There are high ceilings and the whole area is sunken to ground floor level so that you are looking up at street level through the large, tall windows. It is elegantly decorated with wood panels, mounted and stuffed (ooooh yeaaah) deer heads, and nice moulding. My martinis were made well. I can definitely hang here. It is good after work, if you are into suits in midtown (which you probably aren’t, since you are a normal person).

Specials and Other Meats: 7

There’s not much on special by way of meats. That could’ve been because we were seated near the bar, but we were still given access to the full menu, including the price fix special. They have lamb and chicken for alterna-meats: a bit lacking if you ask me. Step up CG. With as many locations as you have, you can afford to throw some pork, veal, and maybe some venison onto the menus.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8

I had the “wagyu” carpaccio, which was delicious – probably the best part of the meal. The meat has a nice aged flavor, was very thinly sliced, and came with a nice peppery arugula dressed just right with a lemon aioli. There is nothing quite like priming the meat hole with some raw meat before adding some pounds of ribeye in. We tried the mashed potato and creamed spinach sides. The creamed spinach was just okay – it was creamy but the spinach itself seemed a little dried out. The mashed were good and creamy, lots of flavor, but after a few minutes of sitting out they became hard. For dessert we had ice cream, which came with a stick of biscotti. Sounds boring but the stuff is very rich and good. Especially the chocolate, and I usually hate chocolate. The creme brulee was perfect.

Coconut cream pie is one of my top five NYC steakhouse desserts.

Seafood Selection: 9

A solid showing here for seafood. The standard shellfish apps were available, along with a special 3oz lump crabmeat item, which I was tempted to order. For entrees there was lobster, swordfish, salmon, tuna, and shrimp – all done a bit different from the usual ways, like cedar planking, Japanese tataki style, etc.

Service: 10

Great service considering we sat at a table near the bar area that was not part of the main dining room. Our waitress was attentive and helpful, and someone from the managerial staff came out with my replacement steak to make sure all was cooked well (medium)… cooked properly that is. The waitress even said as she saw me cut into the first steak: “You said medium, and that is definitely not medium. I don’t know what’s going on back there.” They brought over a free mashed potato app to make up for it – nice try but no dice, dicks. The table bread basket (which we had to ask for) was really nice. There was warm onion bread, hot square-shaped everything bagel-ish things, and a huge matzo-like cracker (similar to Maloney & Porcelli, only better). Kaboom. Small world… I’m eating dinner during the second visit here, and all the while I’m thinking the waitress looks familiar. At the end of the meal I hand her my Johnny Prime card and she says that she remembers me. She says she waited on me in a big group at Vic & Anthony’s. “Tracie” – crazy that she remembered the group. She left there b/c she didn’t like the management and b/c she wasn’t making good $, and the restaurant was always dead. Anyway she gave me some “passes” for their specialty cocktails and a fried calamari app. Pretty funny, and just goes to show how great the service is.

Ambiance: 9

Aside from the obvious corporate milieu, the decor is really nice. The dining room is beautiful – with a view into the kitchen on the first floor. The wall art is classy, the bathrooms are clean and stocked with nice thick paper towels, and it smells fresh. The floors were clean, the ceilings were high, the music was good, and the crowd was just the right size.

I added a few points to this review after a recent trip to celebrate both my birthday and my move back to Manhattan. This place is a solid choice in the neighborhood. And nothing beats the prix fix deal for dinner before 7pm.

Here are some additional photos. Notice the amazing service. They sprayed the table with a confetti cumshot (clown jizz) since they knew we were celebrating, and they also brought out complimentary champagne and dessert (cheesecake and brownie). Our waiter, Edgar, was amazing. He provides the kind of service you get at meals where you spend $200 per person. The manager Tim stopped by too and thanked us for our patronage. I’ll definitely be coming back more often. Tim recently came from Keens Steakhouse, and I’m glad he did, because he’s clearly doing something right!

BURGER UPDATE 10/16/14

The ultimate burger is here at Capital Grill for the fall season, through around Thanksgiving. There are three different styles with a wine pairing for each. The one I stuffed down my esophagus tonight was 8oz of American Wagyu beef with havarti cheese, a fried egg and crispy fried onions on top. In other words it was a fucking cummy wet-dream on a bun.

Not only was the burger great, but so was our waiter, Jeremy. I felt like I’d known him for years! After my buddy graciously picked up the tab for the three of us and bolted to catch his train, me and my other buddy got to chatting with Jeremy about various different steak and burger places around town. Let’s just say I now have a bunch of new places on my short-list, both for burgers AND steaks. Thanks Jeremy: I truly appreciate the heads-up on those places, and I’m looking forward to dining at Capital Grill again, hopefully with you as the waiter.

Now on to the food pr0n. The burger was juicy as all fuck, tender and delicious. The beef quality is off the charts. This is by far the best burger I’ve had at a steakhouse. Look at this shit:

The egg was perfectly cooked sunny-side up and it dribbled down nicely into the meat without fucking up the bun. Like a sloppy BJ without any chick-spit hitting your balls or the sheets underneath your ass. Unreal. And the fries were perfect! Nice and crispy, well seasoned, soft inside. They offer a parmesan herb french fry too, with their regular menu burger, which I also want to try (these Wagyu fucks are a special offering only). And the wine I picked was a really nice Pinot Noir. Smooth.

My buddy opted for the Wagyu burger that was “Kona crusted” in an earthy coffee grind mixture, and topped with caramelized onions (and the havarti cheese). Looks sexy – like a slutty-but-not-quite-fat voluptuous chick who dresses in too-tight clothes and needs a good pounding to satisfy her craving for male attention:

That’s about it for now, you bastards. I’m sure I will be back before Thanksgiving to try out some more burgers here.

BURGER FOLLOW UP 4/8/15

I returned for the Kona wagyu burger when it was offered again in early April. I was delighted to see that Jeremy was there tending bar and actually remembered me! Such a professional, and we talked again about various burger joints. Funny part was that Tracie, who I mentioned above re: Vic & Anthony’s, waited on my wife and I! Pretty neat. She even threw in some desserts for us on the house. A-plus service at this joint, all the way! Anyway, I like the egg burger better than the Kona crust. Despite the meat being amazing quality, I still lean towards a traditional American cheeseburger with a potato bun and your standard lettuce, tomato and onion.

BURGER FOLLOW UP 9/22/17

It’s that time of year again, wagyu and wine!

This baby has aged cheddar and thick cut candied bacon on top.

CAPITAL GRILLE
120 W. 51st St.
New York, NY 10020

Flash Deals, Other Cuts, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews, Upper West Side

Talia’s Steakhouse & Bar

March 20, 2015 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Recently I picked up a Groupon for this joint when they offered a pretty sweet deal: One app, two entrees/steaks, and two sides for something like $65. I figured that was a steal at more than half off the face value of the menu items. The place is Kosher, so I went with a buddy of mine who keeps to the old ways.

Talia’s has a very neighborhood, home style feel to it. Lots of regulars come in, and they even have live music on many nights during the week.

I had read online that some people didn’t like the service in here, but our waitress was friendly and accommodating, as were the people at the host and reservation table. I guess there’s a lesson here: never trust the morons on Yelp.

So on to the meat and potatoes (literally)…

The table bread here was really unique. This fluffy, semi-flat, naan-like bread had a half-sweet flavor quality to it, but that “butter” you see on the right was incredible. It’s not butter, by the way, because butter is dairy, and, in Kosher cuisine, dairy can not be mixed with the beef. Anyway it was salty, herby, really smooth and spreadable. Perhaps based from olive oil? I was devouring this shit:

You can even see the little oven thing where they make and heat the bread as you walk into the entrance door. It takes up some real estate at the end of the bar:

Next was the app: we went with the hummus and mushrooms dish. This came with more of the aforementioned bread. The flavor was excellent on this. The hummus was smooth and the mushroom and onion mix on top reminded me of gravy. If this was slathered onto some fried chicken, you’d think you were eating a middle eastern or Mediterranean southern fusion dish. It may look like vomit, but I assure you it tasted great. Both of us kist kept going back into this for more. But beware – it is very filling:

I ordered the grilled prime rib for one (16oz). It came out on a sizzling hot cast iron plate and smelled delicious. The meat was cooked slightly above how I like it (medium instead of medium rare), but that’s probably due to the residual heat of the cast iron plate. As you can see below, it came to me pretty correct in terms of temperature. The only down side was that it was slightly gamey.

It came with a choice of sides. I went with salad since we were already getting other sides with the Groupon meal. This was a basic mixed greens type of thing. Nothing too fancy or anything, and it definitely fits with the neighborhood, home-style, mom & pop type of restaurant feel.

My buddy got the butcher’s steak, which is a hanger. It was cooked to his liking at medium, had a great charred crust on the outside. I felt it just lacked a little bit of salt in terms of seasoning. His dish came with sautéed kale, which neither of us liked as much as the spinach (below). Something was missing on that – perhaps it needed some pepper or salt.

The spinach was a basic garlic and oil sautee. Pretty solid:

And the fries were golden and crisp. Nicely done:

Overall this place was actually pretty good given the limited menu options for a non-Kosher guy like me. I was happily surprised, as I was expecting the worst based on some of the reviews out there. I was satisfied and felt like I got my money’s worth. While it’s difficult for me to fit this into the standard steakhouse review format, I will give it a shot below.

Talia’s overall score: 58

Flavor: 6 – see notes above.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 6 – basically, we are working with only rib cuts, a hanger, and some form of knock-off tenderloin, since Kosher butchery requirements make it very difficult to extract the filet without running afoul of the system. There is no strip either.

Portion Size & Plating: 5 – basic plating with smaller than usual portions, but this is a low key, neighborhood family type of joint. I wasn’t expecting 24oz rib eyes.

Price: 7 – fair prices given the Groupon. Otherwise it may seem a bit overpriced. However they run the special quite often, so keep an eye out for that if you are considering this joint. You get a lot of food for that Groupon meal.

Bar: 5 – there are only about three or four spots at the bar.

Specials & Other Meats: 7 – there was definitely an entire page of special menu items and even cocktails. As far as other meats go, there was definitely a selection for those not wanting beef (lamb, chicken, etc).

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 6 – a good showing, but nothing to really go bonkers about. The hummus was nice though.

Seafood Selection: 2 – There’s only two salmon dishes, so it’s sort of a weak showing. However, certain items that you typically find in steakhouses, like shellfish, are not Kosher, so they can’t be on the menu.

Service: 8 – Service was good. I don’t know what all the Yelping was about. We enjoyed our meal, the people were nice and we felt warmly welcomed. There are no waiters sitting around preparing themselves to swap your fork out or fold your napkin when you get up, but the water glass was always full, and we never felt like we were waiting around for service. Everything was as it should have been.

Ambiance: 6 – It was crowded, which is not a bad thing, but the tables were a little cramped. Since this is a local neighborhood joint, you are not going to get the crazy, opulent steakhouse vibe like you would down in Tribeca or midtown.

TALIA’S STEAKHOUSE
668 Amsterdam Ave.
New York, NY 10025

Burgers, Midtown West, Other Cuts, Porterhouse, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews, Upper West Side

Porter House

March 3, 2015 Johnny Prime 3 Comments

Porter House overall score: 90

My wife and I came here after hearing good things abut this place forever. I was looking forward to trying some of famed Chef Michael Lomonaco’s dishes. Check out how the meal went:

Flavor: 7 (increased to 9)
My wife and I had the cowboy cut bone-in rib eye. We ordered it medium rare. It was pretty much cooked properly, if not very slightly undercooked (which I don’t normally mind). The first few bites were great…

…but then we started having some stringy bits, gristle and not-so-flavorful uncooked pieces.

The down side was that there wasn’t much fat cap around the eye either, which meant my favorite parts were missing. We ended up with lots of scraps (maybe 12oz worth) – even when sharing the approximately 24oz piece of steak – which I ended up bringing home for making stock. Bummer.

UPDATE 9/27/17

The prime rib, available on Wednesday and Thursday, is a 9/10. Very juicy and comes with a delicious bone marrow side.

UPDATE 6/7/18

I also got to try the porterhouse (9/10)

The chili-rubbed rib eye (9/10)

And the veal chop (8/10)

Dry-aged strip (9/10).

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 9
You have a ton of selections here. Two different rib eyes (bone-in cowboy, and chili rubbed 45-day aged), a filet, a porterhouse for two, and two different strips (bone-in and boneless). Everything is aged and prime, and the filet is black angus. They masterfully hit all four basic cuts. It’s just that the cuts were not executed nicely.

Portion Size & Plating: 9
Portions here are good. I’d say our steak was about 24oz, the apps were large, as well as the sides.

Price: 8
Prices are high here ($63 for the bone-in rib eye). Normally I’d say that you are getting top quality beef and an amazing view of the park from Columbus Circle, not not all seats have such a nice view, and at $63 my steak should have been fucking perfect. I think it’s fair for the slight up charge based on location, but they need to execute at that price point. The apps all hit their marks, however, and they were reasonably prices along with the drinks. This improved, though, on a second and third visit.

Bar: 8
The bar here is pretty decent for being stuck inside a mall. There was a good crowd here, and I can definitely see myself chowing down on a burger and throwing back a few beers. That’d be better than dropping another $63 on a steak, for sure. They have some nice cocktails and a great wine selection as well. I really liked the Peacock Tonic, which had muddle cucumbers, Hendrick’s gin, tonic and rosemary.

Specials and Other Meats: 9
There are lots of alternative cuts of meat here. There’s a roasted chicken, lamb, veal, duck, pork and even a minor cut of beef like skirt (or the steak frites cut that they use for the lunch menu). On special, there was only a soup of the day, which was New England clam chowder. I was hoping for a bit more.

Lamb t-bones and duck steak were both excellent.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9
We tried three apps. First up, the hand cut filet mignon tartare. This was really great. The capers popped, it was dressed just right, and seasoned well.

Next was the roasted bone marrow. This was also delicious. It was lightly salted, and oh-so-smooth to spread onto the grilled country bread. Excellent.

They recently made this even better by adding morels to it.

The fois gras and chicken liver pate was interesting, though I thought it needed a sprinkling of salt. This would shave been better served with the raisin and nut bread that they passed around in the beginning of the meal (see below) instead of the toasted bread that it came with, stacked like Jenga blocks.

We also tried the creamed spinach. Unfortunately I wasn’t a fan of this at all. It was a little watery, too much cream in the ratio, and also had a very strong nutmeg quality to it that reminded me of all the pumpkin spice bullshit you get shoved down your throat in the pre-Thanksgiving and pre-Christmas madness. I almost didn’t want to take it home, but I felt like it’d be such a waste if I didn’t. Maybe if it wasn’t pouring rain outside I would have found a bum to give it to.

We skipped dessert since, after our steak, we were a little underwhelmed.

But on another visit, I think I tried every dessert imaginable, and they were all great:

Seafood Selection: 9
There’s a good variety of seafood in this place. They offer the chilled seafood towers, caviar, scallops, shellfish and crab cakes on the app menu. The three main seafood items on their entree menu looked nice too: lobster, salmon, and swordfish (the steak of the sea, as I call it). Cheers for putting a man’s fish on that menu!

Service: 9 (increased to 10)
No problems to report here, and equally no “stellar marks” moments to report. It was a regular meal that went smoothly, just the right pace, with friendly servers, bus boys and waitresses. On a second visit they treated us to a round of drinks and desserts for no apparent reason at all. Amazing.

Ambiance: 8 (updated to 10 after remodel)
I was hoping for a better atmosphere here, being that the place overlooks Columbus Circle and the corner of Central Park. Unfortunately only some of the seating overlooks that area. The restaurant is nicely lit and decorated, but the white table cloth atmosphere gives it a slightly more formal feel than I was looking for. Nothing wrong with that, but the crowd did seem a little older and stuffier.

I went back in for a burger. This double cheeseburger is only $16 on the bar menu. The burger itself is smothered in delicious, gooey American cheese, and topped with red onion jam and pickled jalapeños. It is damn near perfect, given its placement on a potato bun. Perhaps just a leaf or two of iceberg is all it needs.

The chips were way over-seasoned. My mouth is still sweating from eating them. I think lots of Old Bay or something similar. Heavily salted as well. Skip those unless you plan to suck down several beers to quench your thirst afterward.

PORTER HOUSE
Time Warner Center
10 Columbus Cir.
New York, NY 10019

Tellers overall score: 88

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Charlie Palmer Steak overall score: 89

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The Statler Grill overall score: 73

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NYY Steak overall score: 85

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Saint Anselm overall score: 77

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BV’s Grill overall score: 84

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Tender overall score: 77

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Capital Grille (midtown west, NYC) overall score: 84

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Talia’s overall score: 58

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Porter House overall score: 90

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