My brother in-law inadvertently invented one of the greatest drinks ever described to me. One night he made himself a margarita or two. After drinking, there were still some tasty, salty, boozy ice cubes left in his glass that he didn’t want to go to waste. So he decided to throw a shot of tequila into that bitch. Then he cracked open a beer and poured that into the glass (perhaps it was a Corona?), and followed it up with some agave syrup. Why toss out those delicious margarita ice cubes when you can have one last drink with them? We were mulling over a name for this genius cocktail at Easter dinner when it hit me like a bolt of lightning…
Tabata is a small, no bullshit ramen joint on the corner of 40th Street and 8th Avenue.
The place is legit. Nothing fancy inside either – it gets right down to fucking business.
We started with some crispy baby octopus. These were tasty. Not the most tender I’ve had, but the crisp was nice and the lemon really made them pop.
I had “lava men,” which is their tonkotsu broth (I chose pork rather than chicken) with a spicy kick. It was pretty good. Noodle quality was good to above average, flavor was good, and I had two very nice slices of pork that were soft and flavorful with no rubbery chew. Great part about this little joint is that you get a whole egg in your ramen, not just a half. A third slice of pork would have been awesome, but at only $11 it really was a great bargain.
The real winner here though was my wife’s bowl of “tabata” ramen, which is the owner’s Burmese, non-traditional version of ramen, with a soy and coconut curry broth that was both sweet and savory, with a little kick of spice and some fresh herbage from the onion and cilantro. This was so creamy and flavorful. Man. Amazing. One thing I would love to see is a little pile of sliced red chili peppers for a little extra boom in the spice department.
This is a really fucking simple drink recipe that packs a lot of flavor. I call it “The Smoky Mountain Beehive” for a few reasons. It is “smoky” from the peaty scotch. It is “Smoky Mountain” because of the Tennessee whiskey aspect. And bee-cause of the honey flavor, I went with beehive. See below:
1 part Laphroaig (or any other equally peaty scotch)
1 part Jack Daniels Tennessee Honey whiskey (or you can double the Laphroaig and add some straight honey into the mix)
1 part orange liqueur
1 part orange juice
1 part seltzer
Pour contents over ice into a shaker. Shake the fuck out of it. Pour contents of shaker into a lowball and drink up. I like this with rocks, and it can be garnished with an orange peel or some other bullshit.
Meet Giuseppe Viterale, a meat man after my own heart.
After putting his architecture career to the side, Giuseppe came to the US from Italy, sight unseen. He diligently worked his way up through the restaurant industry, all the way from bus boy, to waiter, to manager, and, eventually, to owner of his own restaurant, Ornella, which is romantically named after his wife of 25 years and staffed with his sons.
But that’s not where it ends. Giuseppe owns a pig farm in the Catskills where he spends lots of time working on and perfecting new recipes, and curing his own meats. SAY WHAT!?!??
For the last few years, he’s been making his own prosciutto, fresh sausages, cured sausages, nduja sausages and other delicious meat items that end up on the seasonal and special menus at Ornella. As you can imagine, the result is a restaurant that is very meat-centric, fresh, dynamic and locally sourced. Shit, he even has a pretty impressive steak menu and hosts a steak night on Mondays for $15… FIFTEEN DOLLARS!!!
But this isn’t just a place for meat eaters either. There’s a sizable vegetarian selection, and the menu boasts an array of authentic Italian dishes. There’s even some unique items like duck meatballs and sanguinaccio (a chocolate blood pudding dessert), inventive sauces like pistachio pesto sauce and orange brandy sauce, and interesting pasta dishes made from hemp, buckwheat and chestnut flour – all made fresh in house.
They’ve even recently added a pizza selection for the delivery menu:
The joint has even been featured on ABC’s Eyewitness News:
My wife and I stopped in for a complimentary press dinner after Giuseppe reached out to me and let me know about his gem of a restaurant in Astoria.
Giuseppe has an incredibly magnetic personality. He is overflowing with information and a desire to impart his knowledge of food history, his food philosophy and his ideas about food culture onto everyone around him. He has actually even considered hosting classes for this very reason. But what exactly is his philosophy? That food, what we eat, how we eat it, and the quality and history of our dishes, is central to everything; our humanity, our health and well being, our economy, our interpersonal relations, and our understanding of one another. And he’s right. The kitchen is the center of any home. The table is where we congregate as a family and actually interact with one another. In a living room, we simply stare at the television. All peoples with rich cultures have rich food cultures, he explained. One thing that crosses cultural, visual, and audio-linguistic barriers is our common need and desire for food. Food brings people together.
Another interesting aspect of Giuseppe’s philosophy was what he referred to as “slow food.” With everything becoming expensive and factory-commercialized, with the proliferation of fast food joints and instant gratification meals, he was drawn to start making his own products and spend real time making dishes as opposed to just buying products and preparing them for diners. This is how the pig farm started. Giuseppe found that he could either buy nduja sausage for $80, which wasn’t that good to begin with and was very difficult to find in the form he wanted due to embargoes and other impediments, or he could make his own and control every aspect of the flavor, just how he wanted. He explained that he could actually verify where an animal came from and what it ate while living, unlike what is happening now with “prosciutto di Parma.” He could ensure the quality, the spice level, and the firmness or texture of whatever he was making. He could take different parts of the animal and cook them each in their correct way in order to utilize the entirety of the animal without wasting the undesirable parts. So many places only cook the items that are quick and easy to move off the line in a kitchen. “Slow food” is more respectful to the product and the environment, he explained.
His passion and respect for food shines through his dishes, as does his inviting, innovative and creative personality. He has applied his background in architecture to his food endeavors. “In order to have a strong building, you first need to build a good foundation,” he said. Quality ingredients, strong, basic cooking techniques… “Then you can build up, you can build flavors.” Well if cooking is architecture, then Giuseppe is Frank Lloyd Wright, and his food is the Guggenheim. Not only is he great with the foundations, but he is wildly creative as he builds up from there.
Here’s what we tried:
First there were the massively poured goblet of Montepulciano wine. Very smooth yet robust and flavorful. A perfect red for meat eating. I had read about the large glasses of wine served here online. This was a treat, and they certainly live up to their reputation of BIG wine pours.
The bread was a nice rustic style, crisp and flakey on the crust and soft and savory on the inside.
Giuseppe sat with us and explained the two different types of sausages we were about to try, both of which were homemade at the farm upstate.
First was the nduja, which is a Calabrian-originated product that is somewhat similar to French andouille, only soft like a pate, as well as spicy. It was spread across a nice slice of farm house bread. The main ingredients are pork belly and red peppers. Simple and delicious.
I’ve never had anything like this before, where it can be spread across bread like butter or pate. It was absolutely amazing. The spice level was mild to medium, so it didn’t ruin your taste buds for the rest of the meal.
Next was the hard, dried sausage. This was aged and cured perfectly. It would make for a really amazing thin-sliced charcuterie plate, but it is equally great to just gnaw on like jerky. It had a wonderful natural flavor. You knew you were eating something that was made with care.
We had the pleasure of trying the famous duck meatballs for our appetizer. In the center was a blend of mild cheeses like mozzarella and ricotta, so as not to take away any attention from the duck.
The orange brandy sauce was a classic pairing with the duck, yet presented in an innovative Italian way in the form of a meatball. Those are raisins you see garnishing the plate as well.
Next up was probably my favorite of the savory courses. Pork chop, pounded flat, lightly breaded and fried, and rolled up / stuffed with mushroom, spinach and cheese, dressed in a marsala wine sauce with mushrooms and served with absolutely perfectly executed cavatelli.
Cavatelli is my favorite kind of pasta, so for me to rave about it here means a little something extra. I loved it – every last bite.
Next was some “slow food” braised beef short rib, on the bone, and served with gnocchi. This was topped with a reduction of the braising liquids, which was essentially carrots, celery, onion and a little bit of tomato.
Despite the fact that I am not a huge fan of gnocchi to begin with (too starchy and often gummy for me), I really did enjoy this dish. The beef was tender and fell off the bone, and the sauce was impressive. When I heard “reduction of the braising liquid” I was expecting something very salty. This was actually kind of light for a beef sauce. Impressive.
Last, but certainly not least, was the absolute star of the show for both my wife and I. You can’t get it anywhere else in the world, as a matter of fact. Only in Astoria at this small restaurant. This is the sanguinaccio. It is a raviolo made from a mixture of chestnut and regular flour, fried up like an empanada but stuffed with a 50/50 mixture of pigs blood and chocolate, to make a blood pudding that’s been spiced with cinnamon, clove, orange peel and sugar. If I had to guess, 90% of people would cringe at the description of this, but all you need to do is take one fucking bite and you will have your entire world turned on its head.
This is definitely a bucket dish: a dish to put on your bucket list, something you must try before you die. And I’m not the only one who thinks this way. This dish (as well as another made by Giuseppe), was featured in the book “1000 Foods to Eat Before You Die,” written by famous New York Times food critic Mimi Sheraton.
I really can’t say enough good things about that dessert. It was amazing, and I’m generally not a sweets guy, and certainly not a chocolate guy. I’ve never seen blood served in a dessert manner. I’d had my fair share of blood sausages, congealed blood cubes like gelatin in asian soups, etc. But never like this in dessert. Amazing. I’ll definitely be back here soon, and I hope you make your way there as well. Go and experience this rare dish, and fall in love with all the other great innovations that Giuseppe has to offer. He’s truly a talented man.
ORNELLA TRATTORIA
29-17 23rd Ave.
Astoria, NY 11105
I hath finally discovered thine best burger in Manhattan, formerly conceived as the colony of Amsterdam. I’ve been journeying on this epic quest for ages now. Alas my search ends at a stunning castle of purest white. And lo, therein, I found a most affordable selection of splendid meat sandwiches hitherto identified as “sliders.” This one doth haveth cheese:
But neigh… other of thine sliders dost not be adorned with thou cheese.
Oft, it is said, thy cheeseless meat sandwich is thy preferred modus of feasting. Yay brothers, sisters, and good fellow countrymen: let ye rejoice in the feasting that occurs at this most enchanting Castle of White.
Alright enough of that fucking garbage. This is my April Fools post. But I have to say… I DO fucking love these little pieces of shit. I don’t care that they smell like garbage and make you piss out of your asshole at a rate equivalent to one hour of ass-pissing per slider. They rule.
My wife recently “brought home the bacon” a few times with some delicious sandwiches from this joint.
First was the special Ad Rock (from the Beastie Boys) sandwich, which had pastrami and all the typical SE Asian sandwich fixings. This was pretty awesome, and came with cream soda and a bag of chips:
Then she came home tonight with a trio of hard, pipe-hittin’ niggaz that would bring even Marsellus Wallace to his knees:
Catfish: my favorite of the three, I think. Oddly enough. This was light, flavorful and really well balanced between spicy, sweet, hot, cold, soft and crunchy.
Pork belly: my second favorite. Deliciously soft thick-cut pork belly that was braised to a jerk worthy flavor level. I took three pics of this bitch.
Brisket: my least favorite of the three, probably because it had too much western style BBQ flavor going on. Otherwise this was a killer sandwich as well. LOTS of meat here too.
These ain’t your typical banh mi sandwiches, but they are fucking awesome.
Dinosaur BBQ is a cool meat lover’s spot up in Harlem near the Hudson River. It’s been killing it up there for years now, but I finally got the chance to try it out.
Inside the warehouse/parking garage-esque space there’s a huge bar with a nice selection of brews.
Me and two buddies went with the bucket of cheap shit: six hipster beers for $16.
Then we split the “Family Stylin’ Meal,” which comes with chicken (far left), brisket (top right), pulled pork (bottom right), and ribs (center) with corn bread (bottom) and three sides.
As you can see they even sprinkled some pickles and jalapeños on the sauced items (brisket and pork):
We went with fries, baked beans and mac & cheese for the sides:
The dark meat chicken was excellent, but I felt the breast meat was a little dry. Both the brisket and pulled pork were great. Smoky, sweet, spicy and delicious, especially with the jalapeños and pickles in each bite. The big star(s) for me though were the ribs. They were perfect. As for the sides: the fries needed seasoning, the beans were good – not too soupy and with a good kick, and the mac and cheese was both creamy and crunchy with perfectly cooked pasta. It’s just too bad I didn’t have my good camera with me, because these photos all suck.
Photos from another trip:
Appetizer sampler – boiled shrimp (spicy and tasty), fried green tomatoes (crunchy and tangy), wings (awesome BBQ wings), deviled eggs (creamy and delicious):
Choose Three with BBQ chicken, St Louis ribs, and sausage, with mac & cheese and salt potatoes:
Full rack of ribs with BBQ fried rice and fries:
DINOSAUR BAR-B-QUE
700 W 125th St
New York, NY 10027
I heard the burger was good here, and I had been in for drinks in the past… so I went in for some food with a buddy of mine. The place has a cool namesake, after a crazy old judge from way back in US history who used to do some outlandish shit in his courtroom. You can read it on their website or Wikipedia. I ain’t going into it here.
With no happy hour specials for drinks, I stuck to the cheap shit ($4).
I ordered the burger with American, but they didn’t have American, so I picked pepper jack. They offer this puppy for $10 during lunch hours (with fries AND a beer included), so I was a little bummed that there wasn’t at least a happy hour deal for drinks. This is $14:
It wasn’t bad. It wasn’t great either. It was mediocre pub food. The meat was cooked nicely, but the bun was a little weak:
Fries were decent. Crispy and well seasoned.
I mocked my friend for getting another chicken sandwich. This is the same guy that I routinely blast for ordering turkey burgers and grilled chicken sandwiches at bars. There are few things that standard bars can do well (outside of the gastro-pubs): they are burgers, wings and a variety of fried appetizer shit. I wasn’t surprised that his sandwich was way under par. It had a small smear of guacamole on it (instead of sliced avocados), a small, thin chicken breast, and the single slice of bacon was cold and limp, contrary to his asking for it well done and crispy. Oh well. Lesson learned – stop ordering bitch food at manly bars.
JUDGE ROY BEAN PUBLIC HOUSE
38 W. 56th St.
New York, NY 10019
I stopped into this ramen joint for a quick bite after a sub-par burger. Since they were out of Orion (one of my favorite Japanese beers), we tried this fucker from NJ. Pretty good – a mild stout.
My buddy ordered some chicken wings, which were nicely crisped and garnished with fried garlic and shallots. Very nice.
I went with the “Prawn Mee” ramen, which is a non-traditional bowl but the menu descritpion sold me on this over the porky miso varietal. It was good. It had a great spicy kick to a broth that was clearly steeped in shrimp shell stock goodness.
The egg was perfectly cooked, and all the shrimp within were similarly perfect. I didn’t love the way the scallions were shredded, but I swept those aside easily so they didn’t get tangled up in the noodles.
Overall I enjoyed it, so I will probably be back to try the miso ramen.
This review is for take-out from The Halal Guys’ new brick and mortar location, down near 14th Street and 2nd Avenue.
I ordered the chicken and rice on the advice of my expert friend. He was going to tell me to get the mixed (lamb and chicken), but told me to keep it real on this first visit. His suggestion was great. The smell was amazing in the cab ride home, and with a midnight buzz going, I was salivating and eager to dive into this bitch.
The chicken was flavorful and spicy, the lettuce was cool and crisp, and the rice was supple and textured. The sauces were both great, though I wasn’t a fan of the hot sauce as much as the white sauce. Perfect late night grub. I’ll definitely brave the lines in midtown during work, now that I know this place serves up some legit food.