Tag Archives: nyc

Embers Steakhouse

Embers Steakhouse overall score: 81

I recently grabbed this Groupon deal for Embers because my buddy recently moved to the area, and I figured we would give this place a shot on my next visit to see his new place. I was pleasantly surprised with some aspects of the meal, and a little disappointed with others. Read on, my friends:

Flavor: 8
We had a group of four with us, so we went with the porterhouse for two and the tomahawk rib eye for two, that way we were able to try all the major cuts in one shot.

The tomahawk was a solid 9/10, and with a slight amount of tweaking I think this could be a 10. The sear was great, and the cook temperature was perfect. Also this is one of the larger bones I have seen come to the table in a while. The steak had to be about 50oz, if I had to guess.

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I was impressed with the quality of the fat cap and how it was still pink through the center. Lots of times the cap can get overcooked since the fat in there gets hot very fast while cooking, and since it is on the outer edge of the steak, it can get overcooked. Check it out though – still nice and pink:

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Keep in mind, this massive tomahawk chop was only $75, too. Amazing value here.

The porterhouse was unfortunately a bit overcooked. It lacked flavor and seasoning as well, despite a few parts of each side being salvageable. I’d say this comes in at about a 6/10.

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Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 9
There are a lot of different cuts to choose from here, and several variations of each cut in terms of size and quality. They have a skirt steak to boot, in addition to the four main cuts of beef. Actually, one of the four rib eyes they offer is even advertised as grass fed and hormone free. As you can see, a couple are labeled as Angus, too. I have to say, I was impressed with this selection. And even though I wasn’t a fan of the porterhouse and didn’t award top points for the tomahawk, I can confidently say that this is some near perfect beef in terms of quality. Maybe some additional aging time and another filet, along with more delineated sizes/ounces would take it to 10.

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The selections up top are all dry-aged right next door at Vinnie’s Butcher Shop, where they source their meats, so they could easily push the aging time from 20 days to something like 35.

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I went in there to take a look before we ate, and I can assure you that the quality is good, and the prices are very affordable, even for dry aged Angus beef.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions are good here, especially for the price point. Sides weren’t too big or too small either. If you don’t notice the portion size too much either way, then that usually means they are correct.

Price: 10
Amazing prices here. They rival the suburbs, but with city quality food. I think I paid $92 for the Groupon, which got me $200 worth of food. With tax and tip, each couple threw in another $65. So all in I spent $111 for two people’s meals (we split the Groupon as well). Also, if you come on the weekend, they offer a $16 brunch special. Pretty good deal.

Bar: 8
Embers is located on a major avenue in Bay Ridge where people congregate to go to bars and restaurants. There’s a nice bar that can seat maybe 10 people near the window, and they make some nice drinks as well.

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Specials and Other Meats: 8
There were a bunch of specials offered on a separate paper menu, and the joint does offer veal, lamb and chicken in terms of alternative meats. They also have an Italian sausage platter for a very fair price ($18).

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 7
We had some stand-outs here, but also some that fell short. We started with one of the stars of the meal, the “bacon steak.” These two slabs cost just $10 for both.

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They were amazing. Perfectly crisp and seasoned, nice and meaty, good quality fat, and served with a tangy and robust steak sauce.

Next was the octopus and calamari app that was on special. They were braised and grilled, nice and tender.

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Our two steaks came with two sides and a vegetable each, so another notch on the price/value belt. We tried roasted corn, baked potato, french fries, grilled zucchini and potato pie. What is potato pie? It’s mashed potato with mozzarella cheese and prosciutto. AWESOME! Not really photogenic, though. I totally got lazy and phoned it in on these pics, folks. Sorry.

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To sum up: get the fries (awesomely crisp) and the potato cake. Pass on the baked potato, for sure. It came with no accompaniments.

Dessert was similar: hit and miss. The creme brulee was good. It was creamy and made correctly.

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The cookie cake was good. Like a thick, soft cookie in cake format with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

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The peach melba was flat. The peaches tasted like they were maybe canned rather than fresh. Otherwise nice whipped cream.

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Seafood Selection: 7
There’s shrimp, salmon and a catch of the day in terms of seafood, aside from the standard shellfish type items on the app menu. From what we tried, I would probably consider ordering a fish entree from here on another visit, or maybe sharing one with my wife as a snack while devouring another tomahawk.

Service: 8
The service here was good, and the waiters were friendly and attentive. They missed one minor item with my buddy’s martini, but this was nothing to make a stink about. Bathrooms could use a remodel or a freshen-up, but table bread in the afternoon on the weekend was interesting, as it consisted of brunch mini-muffins.

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Ambiance: 8
This is a nicely appointed mom & pop joint. The dining room isn’t trying too hard to be fancy or elegant. It doesn’t feel like it needs anything. It’s perfect for what it is, yet you still know you’re eating in a steakhouse. They even have a small side room for larger parties.

I would definitely go here again. I think I would go with the Tomahawk again, the slab bacon, the french fries and I’d maybe try one of the spinach items. With the Groupon deal in hand, this joint is a no-brainer. You should definitely go. Just listen to my recommendations and you are all good.

EMBERS STEAKHOUSE
9519 3rd Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11209

Empire Steakhouse East

Empire Steakhouse East overall score: 85

The Empire Steakhouse empire just opened a midtown east location.

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My friend Matt was asked in for a press meal and he graciously invited me to tag along. We were able to try a bunch of stuff with our group, so I will get right to it.

Flavor: 9
We tried two cuts: the tomahawk rib eye, and the “Emperor’s cut,” which is a T-bone steak from the rear portion of the animal that has a much larger tenderloin side. I’m not quite sure how this is different than a porterhouse, unless what they offer as a porterhouse is more accurately described as a T-bone, which generally has a smaller tenderloin side.

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As you can see above, it looks a bit overcooked. With such a large hunk of beef, that is always a concern. Pair that with the hot plate presentation and some graying of meat is bound to happen. Much of the cut was fine, however, and the large tenderloin was very flavorful. The sirloin side was a little tougher, but this was a welcome texture change from the super soft tenderloin side. Flavors were very meaty, there was a great sear on the outside with a good crust, and the steak was well seasoned. In any case, I’ve decided to also include this cut on my porterhouse page even though it is also on the “other cuts” page as a T-bone. I feel like some diners may expect this was a porterhouse. I do, however, think the price tag on it is a bit hefty when compared to their porterhouse for two. I’m curious about the porterhouse and why it is so much cheaper that this cut. Is the porterhouse on the menu actually a T-Bone, which would mean that the emperor cut is actually the true porterhouse? 8/10.

The tomahawk rib eye was by far the better steak at 9/10. There was a good amount of funk to it, likely from the aging process, and it was cooked perfectly to the specified medium rare. The fat cap was a good size too, as you can see from the up-turned slice below. There is almost an equal portion of eye as there is cap.

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Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 10
All of the major cuts are prime and/or dry aged. The quality here is definitely a cut above (knee-slap). There are many sizes of porterhouse, multiple versions of the rib steak, several filets and even some off-cuts like the T-bone. In addition they offer A5 grade Kobe Wagyu filet and rib eye, imported from Japan.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions here are all fairly large, and plating is simple, without too much flourish. For some items, however, they do make a solid attempt at beauty. The seafood platter, for example, is gorgeous (see below). And all plates were cleaned and wiped of any splash before coming out to the table.

Price: 9
Menu prices seem to be pretty good. There are some items that are very fairly priced, like a porterhouse for two for $96. I think the tomahawk steak ($65), and the emperor’s steak for two ($120) are a bit steep, but there are other alternatives. For example, if you want a rib eye you can choose the regular bone-in at $49, which is under the average price point for midtown steak joints. The porterhouse might be a cheaper alternative to the emperor’s steak, but, like I said above, if you’re all about the tenderloin, then that emperor’s cut might make more sense. The cool thing here is that you are getting great quality for that price either way.

Bar: 8
The bar area is pretty nice. It’s not huge, but it makes the best of the space, with street-side high tops and large door-sized windows that open out to the sidewalk. The bar has a good selection of single malts as well, and they make a good martini.

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Specials and Other Meats: 8
There were no specials read to us, but this place does offer a fair amount of alternative meats, like lamb, veal and chicken. I didn’t notice any pork other than our bacon app. We tried the rack of lamb. This shit rivaled the beef. It was super flavorful, really well seasoned and perfectly cooked.

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Apps, Sides & Desserts: 7
I’ll just fire these off quick. First the seafood platter. I was a little bummed that there were no clams, oysters or mussels. Also, the lobster was completely flavorless, as were the shrimp. That was probably the only thing lacking in this meal, and that’s what is dragging down the score here. But the lump crab meat was absolutely delicious. No lack of flavor there. Also, it was beautiful when it came out to the table.

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As you can see we also tried the Canadian bacon. This was great. I highly recommend this when you come here, as there are very few other bacon apps that are quite as good. Pictured below is just a half of one slice (we ordered two slices to share among four people).

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We also tried the creamed spinach and truffle mac & cheese. Both were excellent. In fact I was wishing I wasn’t so full on meat, because I wanted more of that mac & cheese!

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Last, we also had some onion rings. These were lightly battered on the outside, tender on the inside, and lightly seasoned. We all liked them a lot.

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For dessert, we shared an apple strudel and a slice of chocolate mousse cake. Both were amazing. The chocolate mousse cake was light and fluffy, not overly sweet, and had a really nice oreo cookie crust on it. Delicious.

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The strudel was even better, in my opinion. The flaky dough was crisp but not hard, so you could eat it with a fork without having bits of crust shatter and fly all over the table. The apples had a nice hint of cinnamon and nutmeg to them. Just perfect.

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Seafood Selection: 6
There’s a shitload of fish to choose from here, but from the small amount we had (shellfish app) I am concerned. That lobster and those shrimp… so disappointing. But entree fish is a whole different ballgame. Bass, salmon, sole, tuna, crab cakes, shrimp, scallops and lobster (up to 4lbs) are all on the hot menu here. Since I didn’t try any, I can’t really opine on anything except for the shrimp, lobster and crab meat from the appetizer. Giving the benefit of the doubt for the actual fish, I have split the baby here with a 6/10.

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Service: 10
Impeccable. The guys here really know their cuts, and they are super attentive without being in your face. They were very patient with our photo-taking as well. HAHA! I may as well mention the bread and sauce here too. Same as the other location, they serve up nice warm onion bread rolls, and the steak sauce is pretty good!

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Ambiance: 10
This place is absolutely gorgeous inside. There’s a beautiful spiral staircase just past the bar that goes up to what I assume is a private dining area. There’s also a nice back room with a long “last supper” style table for somewhat isolated large groups, with a large screen TV that plays a digital fireplace video. And beautifully upholstered booths and elegant tables are arranged under what has to be a 25ft ceiling in the main dining room. The back wall has a glass, temperature-controlled wine shelf that goes from floor to ceiling.

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THE 1LB KOBE BURGER

You may have noticed a portion of a burger in one of my shots above. Well, when you’re eating with one of the guys from the Gotham Burger Social Club, you fucking try a burger.

Special thanks to Jill for taking this great shot of the guys:

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Anyway here’s the burger:

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This baby was juicy as fuck. I thought the patty might be too big at a full pound, but I was wrong. It didn’t overwhelm the bun or build up too high, somehow. The inside was cooked somewhere between rare and medium rare.

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There was a great beefy, full flavor to it, as it is Kobe quality. We went with a mild cheese, Swiss, that wouldn’t overpower the meat flavors. This was really fucking good. At $37 (with fries and toppings) I guess it better be! They also offer a standard burger at the bar for $17.

To sum up, this place edges out the other location by a point, and has better marks for flavor, but it may end up being a bigger spread if I ever get back in to try a seafood entree. That section definitely has some wiggle room.

EMPIRE STEAKHOUSE
151 E 50th St
New York, NY 10022

Atlas Steakhouse

Atlas Steakhouse overall score: 78

My wife and I came to this Mediterranean style steak joint for a press meal. For us, heading out to Brooklyn is almost like a road trip, so we were looking forward to coming here and trying something new, outside the usual midtown hustle. This joint is a small mom-and-pop style restaurant, so it was a welcome change from the big mega steakhouses that are bankrolled by huge restaurant group chains in midtown. There aren’t many fine dining restaurants in this area of Brooklyn, so this is a welcome addition. It opened in the Summer of 2015 and seems to be doing well so far.

Flavor: 7
My wife and I split the tomahawk bone-in rib eye for two. The meat itself was nice and juicy, and had good flavor from the generous peppering. It could  have used a bit more crusting, but that’s not a big deal because there was very little bleed-out (as you can see from the photo of the plate below).

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Unfortunately, however, it was overcooked. We ordered it medium rare, and it came out closer to medium well. Part of that is due to the thickness of the cut (difficult to cook evenly throughout), but part was simply just a mistake in the kitchen.

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If I  had to guess what happened, based on how the meat looked when it came out, I’d say it was probably cooked to rare, then sliced and finished off under the broiler to bring it up a bit more. Aside from that, it was tasty.

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Each steak comes with four sauces. One is a horseradish sauce, one is steak sauce, one is peppercorn gravy and one is a tomato-based sauce. All were good, but I think I liked the steak sauce the best (left).

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Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 7
There’s a good deal of options here. All the basics are covered for the major chops (plus a skirt), and there are various size and bone options for each. Very nice. Our cut didn’t have too much of the Spinalis cap, but from what I understand they offer table-side meat selection, so you can typically pick exactly the right cut for you. The website indicates that Atlas ages their steak on site, but I’m not certain whether the quality is prime or choice. The quality of fat on our cut was a bit more gristled than what I usually like, but not unacceptable by any means. There was very little waste on our place. We gobbled down everything. Some portions of the steak were a little bit grainy in texture, but I think that was because of the overcooking mishap.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions are big here. Our rib eye was 48oz! And the plating is done nicely here because they use an elevated platter, that way the big steak plate doesn’t crowd the table and take up valuable dining space. I wish more steakhouses would do the same! Other than that, it is pretty basic. Nothing too fancy. Just simple and elegant.

Price: 9
The prices here are something you might expect in the suburbs. It’s refreshing to see a huge 48oz steak for two listed at just $76. Excellent! And it’s just a quick subway ride away on the B/Q. If you’re on a tighter budget but still looking for a pretty good steak, then this is your place.

Bar: 8
The bar is beautifully decorated. It’s situated near the street so you get some good light, and being located on a major street like Coney Island Avenue makes for a good place to pop in for a drink or a quick bite at the bar, especially if the live music is in session. They have a great looking burger selection on the menu. What better place to throw down on a lamb burger that at the bar?

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Specials and Other Meats: 7
There were no specials off the menu, but you can go with lamb, veal or chicken if you aren’t man enough for beef. They even offer some vegetarian options for the truly vaginal.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 7
We started with the crab cake. This was a good size, and chock full of meat. It had a light crisp on the outside. I think it just needed a pop of some other kind of flavor inside. Perhaps a hit of spice like jalapeño or cherry pepper, or even some celery for a lithe more crunch.

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We also tried the Moroccan oxtail cigars. These are essentially egg roll wrappers that have a nice braised, tender, spiced oxtail meat inside. These were our favorite of the appetizers we tried.

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One of the highlights of this section is the mushroom and spinach gratin. Essentially this is creamed spinach with minced mushrooms in the mix. Absolutely delicious, and it’s one of the best spinach dishes I’ve had at a steakhouse! The big monster steak joints of Manhattan should take note of this gem of a dish. The mushrooms soak up tons of flavor, and the texture becomes dynamic rather than just a mushy goop. I loved it.

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For our first dessert, we tried this crepe cake with chocolate mousse in the layers. Beautiful.

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It was a bit more stiff in texture than I expected, likely because they have to prepare it well ahead of time and store it in the fridge, but I enjoyed it because it had great flavor and was something different from the standard, run-of-the mill steakhouse desserts like tiramisu, creme brûlée and flan.

Next up was yet another unique item, but this one was much more successful. The menu labels it a mango tiramisu, though it is more like a mango mousse re-invention of, or spin on, tiramisu.

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The mango and whipped cream mixture will take you back to the flavor of creamsicles from your childhood. Also there are little buried treasures hidden within the mousse: cream puffs!!! We absolutely loved this dessert. Coffee was good too. Strong!

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Seafood Selection: 7
There’s salmon, branzino and tuna on the entree menu, and a good deal of shellfish on the appetizer menu. Not a bad showing for a small steakhouse! This is on par with the big boys in midtown.

Service: 10
The service here is great. Our waitress had great suggestions for dessert, and everything was nicely timed and cleaned up quickly. They’re attentive, without being in your face.

The table bread was toasty warm – super fresh – and came with a delicious garlic herb butter.

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Ambiance: 8
This place has a really nice decor. It’s a great chic look, but still comfortable. I was very impressed at this place for being a small operation, and they’re truly done an amazing job with the space.

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Atlas also has live music in the evenings (smooth guitar, mellow saxophone and piano), and they just started offering brunch on weekends. They’re also affiliated with the newly restored King’s Theater nearby, which is beautiful. They are one of three vendors who are permitted to advertise and serve in the establishment. That’ll be great for business!

ATLAS STEAKHOUSE
943 Coney Island Ave
Brooklyn, NY 11230

Ocean Prime

Ocean Prime overall score: 90

I rolled through Ocean Prime for a quick NYC Restaurant Week meal one night after work with a friend of mine. They were booked solid, so we grabbed a seat in the lounge area near the bar to eat. While the menu was limited to a small filet for restaurant week (in terms of beef), I figured it was a good opportunity to test-drive the steakhouse before going balls-deep with a big rib eye. Here’s what I thought:

Flavor: 9
The filet was delicious, and was cooked to an absolutely perfect medium rare. It had a good seasoned outside, and the inside was juicy and flavorful. While the outside wasn’t super crisp, it still managed to hold in all the juices.

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I’m looking forward to heading back for a proper rib eye. I have to say… for a place to score an 88 on a test run with a severely limited restaurant week menu… I’m impressed.

Second trip: perfectly cooked rib eye. Similar notes regarding the sear, as the rib eye had a slight wetness on top. Otherwise absolutely delicious. With a bit more crisp on the edges, this would deb full points for flavor.

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Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 8
Three filets, two strips and a rib eye are offered here. There is no beef porterhouse. I have to take a few points for that. The menu indicates that all steaks are prime quality, but nothing is noted about aging. Perhaps a few more bone-in options would also beef up the selection here as well. But with consistent, top notch quality, it might not matter too much. Second trip: upgraded to 8/10.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions are slightly smaller than most places for the price range of midtown steak joints. The plating is elegant and clean, nothing too fancy.

Price: 8
This is an expensive joint, with a small 8oz filet coming in at almost $50, however their most expensive steak is $57, a 12oz “bone-in filet,” so the range isn’t too wide. In any case, they do participate in NYC Restaurant Week, where they offer a three-course meal for $38 that includes an app, an entree, two sides and a dessert.

Bar: 10
This is a great bar for hanging out after work. The crowd is all suits from Bankville, USA, but the space is beautifully apportioned and you can watch the street from the well-lit seating arrangement.

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Specials and Other Meats: 9
There’s lamb, chicken, and a pork porterhouse in terms of other meats. That’s a nice showing, especially considering that this place is a bit lighter on the beef selections and a bit heavier on the seafood selections. Also, on a second trip there were lots of specials read to us from all menu categories, including steak.

Second trip: 14oz strip steak with brie special. Upgraded to 9/10.

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Apps, Sides & Desserts: 9
I had the Point Judith calamari, which was perfectly breaded and fried to a golden crisp, and drizzled with just the right amount of sweet chili sauce. It also comes with roasted cashews, which nails home the distinct Asian dimension to the dish.

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My steak came with mashed potatoes and green beans for the restaurant week menu, so I got to taste a few items. Both were good, but nothing incredible.

The desserts, however, were a different story. I tried both the peanut butter mousse with chocolate ganache, and the carrot cake, which Ocean Prime is famous for at this point. Del Frisco’s has the lemon cake. Strip House has the chocolate cake. Ocean Prime has the carrot cake, which i shy far my favorite, and I DO love the lemon cake at Del’s. Typically, the cake is 10 layers high and a massive wedge. This restaurant week portion was just right for me, as I was already kind of full. The frosting had a great fall-spice to it, and the cake was moist without being too dense.

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The full carrot cake slice from the dinner menu:

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The peanut butter and chocolate pie was good too, but too sweet for my liking. It was light due to the mousse element, though, which is nice. It was also beautiful to look at.

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Second trip: surf and turf appetizer of braised short rib and scallop was incredible. Perfectly executed.

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Second trip: 99% meat in this crab cake. Lots of good crab flavor, nicely accented with a corn salad. This rivals Del Frisco’s.

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Second trip: chop house corn. Very tasty, but I was expecting something more to it. Maybe the addition of some pancetta would do the trick.

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Seafood Selection: 10
There’s a shitload of great looking seafood here. The menu is too extensive to list them all. I was able to try some of the scallops that my buddy ordered, and so far I’m impressed.

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When I return, I’ll definitely be trying more seafood. I like the idea of a steak joint that really raises the bar on the seafood. A lot of places just do lobster and salmon, shrimp and oysters. They don’t go outside the box. Here it is a totally different seafood experience. And it is perfect place for dates: the men can eat their red meat, and the women can watch their figure with some seafood, because sexism rules.

Service: 10
Even in the busy and crowded bar area, we had excellent service. The first course came out fast, and the waitress, Jenny, was really nice and attentive. The fun part about sitting in the bar area is that they give you a free bowl of popcorn, which is wonderfully seasoned. The bread, by the way, is delicious. You get piping hot pretzel bread logs and bread with a soft, whipped butter. Excellent.

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Ambiance: 9
While the main dining room is big and industrial looking, it still has a nice feel to it. It’s spacious, which is good, but it just lacks a little bit of character. One thing that’s cool is that you can view how the kitchen operates by peeking though the long glass window that is visible from the dining room. Upstairs there are some private dining areas, and the bathrooms are beautifully appointed. Second trip: I took more of the ambiance in and I am sold on it being a solid 9/10.

UPDATE 7/17/19

I recently returned to try some more stuff.

Steak Tartare

This was awesome. Up there with some of the best I’ve had. If tartare is your thing, then get this shit.

Lobster Mac & Cheese

This was incredible. I actually ate more of this than anything else the night we came back. Addictive!

Lobster Tails

These twin beauties tasted as great as they looked. You can’t go wrong on the seafood here.

Surf & Turf

Seared scallops with braised short rib? Yup. I loved this appetizer. Solid way to start a meal.

Mixed Sushi Rolls

Everything served on this platter was delicious but I kept hitting that thinly sliced wagyu beef roll. Amazing.

Crab Cake

If that sauce was spicy it would be on par with Del Frisco’s.

Assorted Sides

All great (especially the jalapeño au gratin), except they skimped on the cauliflower & broccoli.

Pork Porterhouse

This was nice. When comparing to Belcampo, this one fell a bit short. But it was by no means bad. Still probably a 7 or 8 out of 10.

Dry Aged Kansas City Strip

This bone in beauty brought a lot of earthy flavor to the table. Of the steaks we tried, this was the winner for sure. 9/10.

Dry Aged Rib Eye

This was less seasoned and had less aged flavor than the strip, but was still a great steak. 8/10.

Dessert Platter

As you may already know, the 10-layer carrot cake here is one of my favorite steakhouse desserts. They also served us a butter cake, which is also one of my favorite steakhouse desserts (but from Del Frisco’s).

OCEAN PRIME
123 W. 52nd St.
New York, NY 10019

Jack’s Sliders & Sushi

My wife scooped up a flash deal for this place that offered five courses with a bottle of wine.

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We got to sample a little bit of everything. I’ll hit you with a rundown of everything below:

The first thing I will say is that this place needs to do better with the pacing of the service. Everything pretty much came out all at once. The table was extremely cluttered as a result, and things inevitably spilled. I don’t mind too much, but maybe the kitchen needs to think about that when they receive orders.

We “started” with the spicy salmon salad to share. This was essentially a bed of lettuce topped with onions, diced salmon sashimi and spicy mayo. I thought it was delicious. Simple and tasty.

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The two sliders we tried were “Jack’s” and “The American.” “Jack’s” had bacon, onions and a spicy mayo, while “The American” was a simple lettuce, tomato, onion and cheese burger. The better of the two was Jack’s. It was nicely seasoned, had a good char, was cooked just right, and even had their dog logo pressed into the bun.

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We devoured these with an order of the old bay and herb french fries. These were excellent: golden crisp! Glad we ordered these above and beyond what the flash deal provided.

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Our next course was ramen. We tried the pork and beef bowls, skipping a sushi choice. The pork ramen was bland and lacked flavor – even the pork meat itself, which looked great, was just a little too boring. In hindsight, I wish we ditched the pork ramen and went with a sushi roll instead.

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The beef ramen had a good salt level, decent thin-sliced meat, and a thicker broth. That was the winner of the two, but I would say that if ramen is your game, then you should go to another place. This place is better for the burgers and sushi, and the ramen comes off more Chinese in flavor than Japanese.

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Our next item was braised short rib. The veggies here were useless. They tasted frozen or over-steamed or something. Not much flavor. But the beef itself was good. The meat was soft and tender, and the fat was all edible.

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Our wine was actually good. We went with the merlot instead of cabernet, chardonnay or pinot grigio. I thought it was going to be a headache-inducing acid reflux fest, but it was smooth and mild.

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For dessert, we tried two ice cream sandwiches. One was a sugar cookie with cookies and cream ice cream in between, and the other was red velvet cake with taro ice cream in the middle. Both were good, but we liked the sugar cookie better. The cookie held up better than the cake as “sandwich” material.

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Overall this was a decent meal. Skip the ramen, stick to the raw fish and burgers, and get the fries. That should keep you happy.

JACK’S SLIDERS & SUSHI
171 3rd Ave.
New York, NY 10003

Yachtsman Steakhouse

Yachtsman Steakhouse overall score: 85

My wife and I went to Disney with her family for a short vacation. While there, we hit this steak joint.

Flavor: 8
We tried nearly every cut of steak, so I was able to get a good feel for the quality of the beef as well as the skill of the chef. This place can definitely hang with NYC’s greats. I wasn’t expecting much after my last experience at a Florida steakhouse, but my wife really did her research on the dining options for this trip.

First, the rib eye, which I didn’t order but I tried a good amount. It was perfectly cooked and remained tender and juicy, with a great crust on the outside as well as a creamy blue cheese butter. This was probably a nine, and it came with a beautiful, big serving of bone marrow!

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My wife and I tried the porterhouse for two. This was an eight. It was cooked nicely but just fell a slight bit short on seasoning. Otherwise, top notch. Both sides were tender and juicy, with just a few areas where things got over cooked along the edges.

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My brother in law had a chimichurri strip steak, which was ordered medium well (he’s not a good steak orderer), yet it still retained flavor and some juiciness despite the ruination. Eight.

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My other brother in law had the filet, which was big and juicy. Also an eight.

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Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 9
They have a lot of options here, and several variants within – like aged and prime. Take a look at the menu. All that’s missing, really, is an aged bone in rib eye. Arguably the most important cut, but I only took a point.

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With a few tweaks in preparation, and some longer aging times, this place could be incredible. They even have an aging room on the premises, visible to diners, where they age the beef and hang the charcuterie:

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Portion Size & Plating: 9
Portions here are large; plating is nice without being overly elegant. High marks on the charcuterie board, porterhouse and pork belly with clams plating in particular.

Price: 8
The prices here are pretty steep for Florida, but then again you are at a Disney resort, so a mark-up is expected. On the other hand, the food is well worth the money here. This is comparable to a NYC steakhouse, both in quality and price.

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Bar: 10
This joint has a full separate-but-attached bar called the Crew’s Cup that adjoins the restaurant. It’s a great looking country club kind of place, and the drinks are pretty good and cheap as well ($8.25 for a Beefeater martini is very fair in my eyes, being used to NYC).

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Specials and Other Meats: 7
There were no specials read to us, and the menu is pretty bare when it comes to other meats aside from beef: only chicken. I don’t mind much though, because I don’t go to a steakhouse to eat any other protein but beef, and the showing of beef here is pretty excellent; it even includes prime rib and bison (which I still consider to be beef, in a weird way).

My mother in law tried this vegeterian pasta dish, which was beautifully plated:

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Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
The first appetizer that we tried was a charcuterie board. Here’s what was on it:

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I’m always a bit underwhelmed by the amount of stuff on charcuterie boards at restaurants these days, but I get that this stuff is expensive and difficult to make. Anyway, this was all very good:

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We also tried this pork belly and clams appetizer, which was incredible, although a bit salty.

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The hunk of pork belly in the center was generous, and perfectly braised yet crispy on the outside. The fried lotus root was an elegant touch, and the broth was great to soak up with bread.

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The sides here were great. Our porterhouse came with beef fat roasted potatoes and a trio of sides: caramelized onions, sautéed mushrooms and creamed spinach. I enjoyed them all. The creamed spinach was more creamy than I usually like, but it wasn’t overpowering. The beef fat potatoes were incredible – the beefy marrow flavor really took me by surprise. They were just a bit greasy, unfortunately.

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The last side we tried was the truffle mac and cheese. This was made with orecchiette pasta and some fried onions. It was really delicious, and probably one of the better truffle macs that I’ve had.

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Unfortunately we had to skip dessert. Too full!

Seafood Selection: 7
There’s red snapper and scallops on the menu here in the entree section. Other than that there’s just the usual shellfish apps. I was a bit surprised not to see any lobster on the menu.

Service: 10
This place is over the top and excellent. As you might expect, this kind of thing happens all over Disney. The people who work here are amazing, and they really, sincerely want you to enjoy your time there. Our waiter, Ricardo, was fantastic.

I guess I should mention the bread here. It comes with a really nice soft and salty butter, as well as a head of roasted garlic for spreading!!! You can choose onion pull-apart bread, or baguette style bread – or both.

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Ambiance: 9
The building and all surrounding areas are amazing at this part of the resort. When you enter the yacht club area, you’re greeted with an amazing, huge old fashioned globe in the entryway.

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The Yachtsman Steakhouse itself (which is within the club near some other restaurants) attempts to hit the mark with the country club / yacht club look. It ALMOST nails it, but not quite. Something was missing, and I can’t put my finger on it.

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DeStefano’s Steakhouse

DeStefano’s overall score: 80

DeStefano’s seems to regularly offer Groupon deals in which you pay X number of dollars for Y amount of restaurant credit. Those are always the best kinds of deals. In our case, we had $90 credit for about $50. Our discount, however, was nearly voided completely when the lovely City of New York decided to shut down the L train in both directions due to police activity stemming from the infamous annual “pants off subway ride.” So after $25 in cab fare, we arrived to our destination about 30 minutes late.

Flavor: 8
This joint offers something a bit unique: a rib eye that is cooked with fennel. This highly Italian preparation doesn’t add much sweetness, as you might expect (Which is good), but the resulting “grilled fennel” that comes with the steak has a grilled onion quality, only less salty and more mild. I liked it. While the meat itself was aged (28 days) and prime, I felt that it could have benefited from a slight hit of more salt. The pepper usage was perfect, and the meat was cooked to a very nice medium rare. The only other down side was that the steak was sitting in a pool of butter and/or oil. I don’t mind that too much, but soaking in that will remove any good seared crust that may have developed on the outside of the steak during cooking.

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Below is a closer look at the fennel. The steak comes served on a bed of sliced and grilled fennel (unless you request otherwise).

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I should note here that the porterhouse cuts looked amazing. I saw two come out for other tables and my eyes lit up. You all know that I’m primarily a rib eye guy, so for me to get excited over a porterhouse is kind of a big deal. I’d definitely like to come back and try one of those big fuckers.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 9
You have all your basics here, but the quality is prime and the meats are aged to give the cuts a great flavor. My cut had a good amount of tasty beef jelly fat between the spinalis and the eye. I like that. It’s like marrow!

Portion Size & Plating: 9
My steak was a 24oz bone-in cut, served on a silver platter. Very nice. Sides can be ordered for one or for two, and the sizes are generous.

Price: 8
My rib eye was $58. That is midtown pricing. A bit high, in my opinion, for something that didn’t get full points for flavor, but balance that against the fact that DeStefano’s almost always has a Groupon deal available and it evens out. I also can’t complain too much here because the management generously comp’d our dessert.

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Bar: 5
There is a small three-seat bar beside the host station when you walk into the restaurant. This is certainly not the kind of place you go for, say, a happy hour or to just hang out at the bar. They do, however, make a good martini. My wife’s old fashioned was just so-so, she reported.

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Specials and Other Meats: 8
Our waiter David read off some special apps for us, so there are definitely some off-menu items to explore. For other meats, you have lamb, veal and chicken. Not a bad showing.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
We tried two apps. First was the sweet and spicy bacon. This slab came in just under $5 and was nicely cooked to a soft yet crunchy texture.

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Next up was DeStefano’s version of carpaccio; a shoulder cut of beef that is tenderized and seared on the outside before slicing thin and serving with arugula, lemon and shaved parmesan. This reminded me of my dad’s “steak salad.”

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It went nicely with the sliced table bread as well.

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On the side we tried an order of creamed spinach. This was okay. I’ve had better, and I’ve certainly had worse. The top had a nice crunchy texture from baked breadcrumbs, and the spinach itself was only lightly creamy, which, in general, I like.

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For dessert we had tiramisu. This was creamy and soft, not too boozed up, and very light. I enjoyed it, and it was a good recommendation from our waiter.

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Seafood Selection: 7
There’s grilled mahi mahi and a pair of seafood pasta items on the entree menu, otherwise you’re limited to the app and salad section for your seafood (crab cakes, BBQ shrimp, lump crab, etc). But you’re coming here for steak anyway, so don’t get all bent out of shape over this.

Service: 10
David was an excellent waiter, and all the staff was helpful and nice. Our water was always filled, we never had to wait long for anything, and the management was very generous for comping our dessert. I’d definitely eat here again – especially to try that porterhouse I mentioned above. The table bread is nice – basic, nothing too fancy – and served with extra virgin olive oil and balsamic.

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Ambiance: 8
You’re actually entering someone’s former home when you eat here. You feel like the home owners have cleared out their living room and set up nice dining tables for you to eat their home cooked meal. It’s very charming, and all the walls are covered in family photos going back to the 50’s (perhaps even earlier) and coming up to present day.

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DESTEFANO’S
89 Conselyea St.
Brooklyn, NY 11211

Prime Steakhouse

Prime Steakhouse overall score: 68

My wife and I, along with three other couples, came here for a blowout steak meal while we were on vacation in Key West. I didn’t have high expectations since NYC is the steak capital of the world, but everything looked pretty good online in terms of menu and reviews. Check out the breakdown:

Flavor: 6
I had the 24oz bone-in rib eye. The chop itself was prime quality, but not aged. It was slightly thicker on the bone side than the fat cap side, which made me worry about the evenness of cooking.

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To my surprise it was cooked nicely to medium rare, despite the cut.

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It lacked ample seasoning, however, and, the outer crust had a spotty or uneven sear on it. Some parts were lightly seared, and other parts were over seared, which created a bitter, burnt flavor in some bites.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 7
The menu here covers all the bases with a strip, porterhouse, filet and rib eye. They offer a surf and turf option as well, but overall our table was not quite impressed with the quality. Perhaps some aging is needed to take these chops up a few notches.

Portion Size & Plating: 8
Portions are good here, with everything being a good size, and plating is basic but elegant.

Price: 6
At $62 for a rib eye I should be getting something that rivals NYC’s best. That was not the case. Most of the other items on the menu were NYC prices as well, so we left feeling a little over-spent.

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Bar: 5
For this location, which is on the water and on the second floor of a pier, I was expecting a big bar that was either outside or facing the water. But instead it was a somewhat small bar that faces a wall. The drinks were pretty good, and the cocktail menu had some interesting selections, but drinks are a bit on the pricey side.

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Specials and Other Meats: 7
There wasn’t anything of note on special aside from a pasta dish, but the place does offer a decent amount of alternative meats, like two cuts of pork, veal and chicken. No lamb, but that’s not a huge deal. My buddy’s wife ordered the veal:

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Apps, Sides & Desserts: 6
We over-ordered on sides, which is often a problem when dining with a big group at a steak joint. There were some hits and some misses. I’ll start with the biggest hit – the carpaccio:

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Though a bit salty, the hit of truffle oil complimented the capers and shaved cheese nicely. The meat itself was super thin and soft.

The oysters were crisp, clean and fresh, and extremely well priced at $16 for a dozen.

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Another starter was this mozzarella and tomato stack with balsamic vinaigrette and basil. Decent, but nothing special.

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On the side, we enjoyed the hash brown potatoes. They were fried crisp on the outside and tender on the inside.

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The creamed spinach was way too heavy on the cream while also being very light on flavor.

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The truffle mac and smoked gouda had utterly no flavor or scent of truffle whatsoever, and it also lacked seasoning. It had a decent crunch on top at least.

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Dessert was a star though, which was key lime pie that is made in house from fresh, local ingredients. Great way to end the meal.

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Seafood Selection: 8
There’s a good amount to choose from here for seafood, as you might expect being in Key West. I mentioned the oysters above already, but my wife had the tuna tataki appetizer as her entree, which was pretty good.

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She also had a she-crab soup, which had a nice flavor to it as well. Prime also has a few local fish and fresh catch items available for entrees in addition.

Service: 9
Chance was a great waiter, and we had no complaints on timing or anything like that. It was a big table, and he did a solid job tending to our needs. Bread was a bit lame, but the butter was a whipped sweet/honey style that I do enjoy from time to time.

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Ambiance: 6
Perhaps this place is a bit nicer to dine in during the daytime, when you can see out over the water or hang out on the deck outside the restaurant. I just felt like this place could be anywhere, and being in Key West Florida, on the fucking water, they could have made more of the surroundings.

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Blu on Park

Blu on Park overall score: 90

NOTE: THIS PLACE IS NOW CLOSED

This joint just opened up on 60th Street, just east of Park (not actually ON Park, but close enough). Owner Amir is having a great first few weeks after opening, with a packed house on most nights. Chef Russell slings the food here, after doing a 12 year stint at The Boathouse in Central Park. Impressive.

Flavor: 10
I ate here with my wife, sister in law and brother in law, so we got to try a good amount of food. For our steaks, we went with a 40oz tomahawk rib eye for two, as well as a porterhouse for two. Let me first discuss the tomahawk:

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This fucker was cooked perfectly. You can see that nice bright pink medium rare awesomeness  stretch from end to end. The crust had ample and robust seasoning, which was kept simple to course salt and cracked pepper. Even the far end of the fat cap was still a perfect medium rare; I was really impressed with that.

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The porterhouse was similarly pro-executed. In fact, in the first few bites, we couldn’t readily identify which side was which between the filet and the strip – THAT’S how tender the strip side was!

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On second glance it’s clear that the top is strip and the bottom is filet, but the filet side was quite generous.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 10
Blu offers two sizes of filet, two sizes of rib eye, multiple sizes of porterhouse and a strip. Everything is aged for about 28 days (with the exception of the filet) and is prime quality. These babies come from Master Purveyors in the Bronx. I’m familiar with their products and I can tell you they are top notch.

Portion Size & Plating: 10
Portions are all generous here, from apps on up the chain to entrees and desserts. The plating is simple and elegant, no fuss.

Price: 8
The prices here seem to be on par with other steakhouses in the area. It was a hefty bill, but I didn’t feel ripped off. In fact, it was the opposite: I was really happy with the meal and was happy to fork over money for a well-worth-it meal.

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Bar: 8
This place puts up some really great cocktails, and it has a killer selection of scotches, like Ardbeg Uigeadail – a super smoky and peat-infused islay whisky.

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The bar is a beautiful black quartz topped stretch that is clean and chic, with gorgeous high tops and seating nearby.

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Definitely a cool place to hang out, especially with cocktail napkins like these – haha!

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Specials and Other Meats:7
There were no specials just yet, as the joint is pretty much brand new! The only other selection aside from beef was veal – the rest is seafood. I don’t mind that one bit – it’s just one spot where I need to deduct some points.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
We tried some oysters and the beef carpaccio for starters. Both were incredible. The oysters were west coasters that were meaty, clean and crisp:

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The carpaccio was filet that was sliced thin and topped with some watercress greens, meyer lemon, crispy fried artichokes and shaved cheese. Great way to prime up for more meat.

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For sides, we went with creamed spinach, whipped potatoes and roasted king oyster mushrooms. Let’s start with the best – the mushrooms.

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I typically pass on mushroom sides at steakhouses because they generally seem to be a huge waste of money. They’re usually some crappy-ass button mushrooms that are overly buttery and mixed with onions. They may taste fine, but I can do that at home for $3. Here, the king oyster mushrooms, first off, are expensive and more rare. Second, they’re meaty and earthy, a great compliment to a piece of steak. They roast them with garlic here and they come out absolutely perfect. Third/last, at just $12 I find this to be a great buy. I’ve seen these ‘shrooms go for $24-$32/lb in some grocery stores. They also offer these “unsliced” and with a few other sides as a main, vegan option entree. Great idea.

The creamed spinach was a bit lacking for me, but my wife and I both agreed that we enjoyed the texture, which was broken up here and there with some crispness.

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The mashed potatoes, which I didn’t photograph, were creamy and smooth, but they were nothing to necessarily write home about. When I visit again, I’ll stick with the mushrooms and maybe try the french fries instead.

For dessert we shared a key lime pie that was more like a layer cake than pie. My wife and I really enjoyed the change-up for this dish. The cake had an almost nutty quality, with the texture of carrot cake. It came with a scoop of coconut sorbet that was really icy and mild – not too sweet.

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The manager, Carlos, was a real gentleman. He sent over a complimentary glass of after dinner dessert port for each of us, as well as a follow up reception at the bar with glasses of champagne and a cheese platter! We were blown away.

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If you lack a sweet tooth, like I sometimes do, then this cheese plate is the way to go. The blue cheese on there is incredible! Especially when you mix bites alongside the fig cake.

Seafood Selection: 10
There’s a shitload of awesome, fresh fish on the menu. Salmon, branzino, sea bass, tuna and lobster all grace the menu in entree format. The apps are chock full of shellfish offerings (as mentioned above), and the plateau selections looked amazing.

Service: 10
I already mentioned Carlos’ amazing hospitality above, but I have to say that everyone here is great. All the way from owner to management, from front to back and the bar in between. Our waiter, Johnny, was a real gent (nice name too). And everyone was dressed really nice and sharp – waiters had nice suits with bow ties, and the table service was highly attentive without being in-your-face all the time. Well done guys!

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The bread was warm and fresh – olive stick or white dinner roll – and the butter was soft and easily spreadable.

Ambiance: 9
Amir has curated an absolutely incredible renovation from what was once a Chinese food restaurant and an office space into a really elegant and inviting two-floor steak joint. The downstairs is perfect for hanging out and sipping cocktails. Up a half a floor is a nice small dining area with a fireplace and high ceilings, with impressive wine shelving all over the walls.

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Then up another half level is a long stretch of beautiful dining space that overlooks a huge full-front-of-the-building window and nicely painted exposed brick walls. There’s even a small private dining room that can probably seat about 20 for events.

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GREAT new spot. Check it out and tell them I sent  you.

BLU ON PARK
116 E. 60th St.
New York, NY 10022

Ramen Guide

With ramen season kicking into high gear, I suppose it’s high time that I put out a guide to ramen for all of you cold, hungry fucks out there looking to get your soup on. This should serve as your singular, all-encompassing resource for all things slurp. This is more of an informational page, clearly, so if you’ve landed here looking for my ramen reviews, you should go to the Ramen-Ate-R page, where you can read about the tremendous shitload of ramen that I’ve eaten.

There are a bunch of things you need to keep in mind when thinking about ramen. Namely, you need to think about the thickness of the broth, how the broth is made, how it is seasoned, what kind of noodles are used, the toppings, and, finally (if you’re into food knowledge), where the ramen style was developed and the history behind the dish. So let’s get into it:

BROTH THICKNESS

This is classified as either assari (light) or kotteri (rich). Assari broths are generally thin or clear, as they are typically flavored with vegetables, fish or seaweed. If animal bones are used at all, they are usually just simmered lightly for a short amount of time.

Kotteri, on the other hand, are thick and usually opaque, due to all the emulsified fats, proteins and minerals that are rendered from boiling animal bones for long periods of time. That makes them stocks, technically, not broths. Kotteri are also known as Paitan (from the Chinese). Paitan translates to white broth, which makes sense, given that they are usually cloudy in color and thick in texture.

SOUP BASE

Ramen soup bases are classified by the main ingredients that are boiled or simmered to make the soup stock (if bones are used) or broth  (if no bones are used). As expected, a stock can be made from animal bones (chicken, beef, pork, fish). But lighter broths can be made with dried seafood or kelp/seaweed (like dashi – a broth made from dried, smoked bonito flakes and kelp), and sometimes even just straight up roasted veggies and mushrooms + water.

An example I will use to illustrate here is tonkotsu. “Ton” means pork, and “kotsu” means bones. Thus, the tonkotsu ramen base is a kotteri style thick stock made from pork bones, which would then need to be seasoned with a salty or savory component, which is covered in the next section.

SEASONING

Tare or kaeshi is the seasoning – the main savory element or source of salt – that is used to flavor the ramen. Ramen seasoning comes in three major varieties: Shoyu, Shio and Miso.

Shoyu: This, simply, is soy sauce. If you didn’t know, soy sauce is made from a paste of fermented and boiled soybeans, roasted grains and seasoned water.

Shio: Sea salt. Pretty straightforward. As you can imagine, sea salt as a seasoning is nicely suited for thinner, assari style broths.

Miso: This is an earthy flavored, thick, fermented soybean paste. Seasoning with miso will almost always result in a thick, kotteri style broth, as you can see below:

NOODLES

Ramen noodles are made with wheat flour, water, salt and kansui, an alkaline water which gives the noodles their yellow color and characteristic bounce. In China, it’s more common to see ramen made with eggs instead of kansui.

Depending on the soup they’re added to, ramen noodles can range from wavy to straight, thick to thin, flat, round or square. The type of noodle selected for a bowl of ramen is based on its broth-clinging characteristics, its bounciness and its texture. For that reason, one noodle style may be better suited for a particular soup base or broth thickness than another.

Depending on the noodles used, cook times will vary as well. In addition, their ability to last for a while, soaking in the soup broth, will vary. After a few minutes certain noodles will lose their spring and bounce, and the texture will change.

Just an FYI here: if you need more noodles while you are eating, yell out kaedama!

TOPPINGS

We have a bunch of categories to discuss here. Let’s start with the most important one: meat.

Obviously if a ramen base is made with animal bones, it only makes sense to use the same animal meat as a topping for the soup. Tonkotsu should have copious amounts of kakuni (pork belly), or chashu (rolled pork loin or belly that is cooked slowly in a sweet soy and mirin sauce, stew-style, then sliced and sometimes charred or grilled afterward for texture). Clearly, chicken is a good topper for your chicken-based ramen. But some chefs get creative. For example I’ve had beef ramen that was topped with crispy beef intestines. I’ve even had chicken broth that was topped not only with chicken but with ground pork as well. Mixing is not a bad thing and it is quite common, as you’ll learn below.

In addition to meat, ramen broths also contain aromatics, such as garlic (fresh, charred, fried or fermented), onions (charred, pickled or raw), ginger (either pickled – beni shoga – or fresh), leeks (fresh or charred), scallions (usually fresh, typically sliced or shredded) and mushrooms (both dried and fresh, and a ton of different types). These can also be incorporated into the creation of the soup base at the start, not just as toppings that are added at the time of serving.

Other common toppings include seasoned soft boiled or hard boiled eggs, sliced fish cakes (naruto), bamboo shoots, corn, cabbage, seaweed, bean sprouts, spice pastes, butter and various oils, such as chili oil, onion oil, pepper oil, garlic oil or sesame oil (and certainly sesame seeds, too, for that matter).

On many occasions, the toppings you see will depend on the region in Japan from which the ramen hails.

REGIONAL STYLES

Japanese ramen varies greatly by region. Some areas focus on thinner fish- and seaweed-based broths, while others tend to be hearty and thick animal bone soups. I’ve highlighted some of the regional styles below, alphabetically:

Akayu: A sweet and mild ramen soup is topped with a spicy dollup of miso mixed with chili and garlic. Chewy, thick, wavy noodles grace this style, and it is usually served with powdered seaweed as well.

Asahikawa: Asahikawa is Hokkaido’s second-largest city, and is located at the base of the mountains in the middle of the island. Its ramen is a mix of chicken, pork and seafood broth, with a shoyu base. The soup is topped with a layer of melted pork fat to seal in the soup’s heat in the colder months, as well as pork meat, bamboo shoots and scallions.

Hakata: Also known as Nagahama ramen, this style comes from Fukuoka, a prefecture in Japan’s southern island of Kyushu, which is famous for its pork dishes. This is my favorite of ramen styles, because it is a thick, fatty, pork bone broth with thin, al-dente noodles. Toppings usually include sesame seeds, pink pickled ginger and fried garlic.

Hakodate: Ramen arrived in Hakodate from China. The soup is thin and light, and the shio-seasoned broth had a mild pork and chicken base. Noodles are usually soft, with toppings like roast pork, bamboo shoots, scallions, nori, fish cakes and spinach.

Kagoshima: Kagoshima is known for its Berkshire pork-like black pigs, yet the ramen is a mild mix of both veggies and chicken, combined with the black pork bone stock. The broth then gets finished off with burnt onions and seasoned with soy sauce. The noodles are soft, and toppings consist of pork meat (obviously), scallions, wood ear mushrooms (kikurage) and bean sprouts.

Kitakata: Kitakata is famous for a clean, light soy-based breakfast soup. In the bowl there’s usually a serving of chewy, wide, flat and curly hand-cut noodles with pork, scallions and bamboo shoots.

Kumamoto: When tonkotsu ramen arrived in Kumamoto prefecture from Kurume, the locals started cutting it with chicken broth. It’s also served with straight noodles, though they’re softer and thicker than the Kurume style. Most bowls have pickled mustard greens, sliced wood-ear mushrooms, bean sprouts, and cabbage on top, but the unique thing about Kumamoto ramen is the use of garlic. You’ll see fried garlic chips and mayu, the black liquid made from garlic that’s been burned in sesame oil. That shit is delicious.

Kurume: This town on the southern island of Kyushu is the birthplace of tonkotsu. Melted bone marrow, fried lard, sesame seeds, pickled ginger and garlic give Kurume ramen a unique and pungent style. Toppings include pork meat, scallions, nori, and spicy mustard greens, in addition to those just mentioned above.

Kyoto: Kyoto’s home to two distinct types of ramen: a thinner assari shoyu ramen, and a thick kotteri chicken soup. The thin version is a blend of pork and chicken broth, with a dark soy base. The thick version is a rich porridge-like chicken soup, topped with garlic, spicy bean paste, chives and odoriferous local onions called kujnoegi. Both are seasoned with shoyu, but the toppings vary for each.

Nagoya “Taiwan” Ramen: “Taiwan Ramen” is Nagoya’s reimagined version of Taiwanese danzimian, which has lots of ground pork, Chinese chives, hot peppers, green onions and garlic. This shit is for people who like spicy soup.

Onomichi: Take a bit of pork, a heap of chicken, some local seafood and a big mess of lard and you’ve got Onomichi ramen. The soup has a shoyu base and is served with chewy, homemade, wavy, flat noodles. It’s usually topped with roast pork, bamboo shoots, scallions and pork fat.

Sapporo: Sapporo-style ramen hails from Japan’s northernmost province, Hokkaido, which is the birthplace of miso ramen. Sapporo miso ramen generally has thick, strong noodles and is commonly topped with bean sprouts, sweet corn, cabbage and ground pork. Soft boiled eggs and thick slices of chashu pork are also common, as well as pats of butter.

Shirakawa: This town developed a refined ramen typified by light, simple soup and hand pulled noodles. It features a shoyu broth, but local mineral ­water makes for springy noodles with a good chew. Toppings include roast pork, bamboo shoots, fish cake, scallions, seaweed, spinach and even wontons.

Tokushima: Shikoku is the smallest of Japan’s four main islands, and udon is the preferred noodle. But Tokushima prefecture has an aged, extra strong shoyu soup that originated with tonkotsu stocks made from leftover pork bones from nearby ham factories. This is similar to Wakayama ramen. Ramen shops here will add a few strips of thinly sliced pork belly and break a raw egg on top. Tokushima ramen is sometimes divided into “yellow,” “black,” and “white” styles (how racist) of varying strengths. Other toppings for this ramen consist of scallions, bamboo shoots and bean sprouts.

Tokyo: This ramen is usually made with pork and chicken broth and typically features slightly curly, somewhat wide noodles. Very often in Toyko you’ll find broths that are flavored with dashi (broth made from aged bonito flakes and sea kelp). This style of ramen is generally seasoned with shoyu and has a medium-thickness. It’s similar to Yokohama ramen, though that tends to be heavier and meatier than the dashi broths of Tokyo ramen.

Tsubame-Sanjo: The cities of Tsubame and Sanjo are in a freezing cold area, and the ramen from this spot is bizarre and unhealthy. The hearty stock is made of chicken, sardines and pork bones, and the bowls are blasted with tons of pork fat (common in soups from the colder climates). There’s thick, flat noodles in this shoyu-based soup, and toppings include pork meat, bamboo shoots and lots of chopped white onions.

Wakayama: This is the median between thick, rich tonkotsu, and thin, clear broth. Wakayama ramen has a strong shoyu tare seasoning with a long-simmered tonkotsu base. The noodles resemble the thin, firm and long threads of Hakata style ramen, but you also get fish cakes like those in Tokyo style ramen. These soups are also topped with the seemingly ever-present and most common of toppings: roast pork, scallions and bamboo shoots.

Yokohama Ie-Kei: Yokohama is known for ie-kei ramen, a viscous, salty, and fatty tonkotsu shoyu style of ramen. When ordering, diners can designate how firm they want their noodles, the amount of fat they like on top, and the saltiness or strength of the soup. This is my kind of ramen – catering specifically to each unique diner. The toppings for this style of ramen usually include sheets of nori (seaweed paper), spinach, garlic, spicy bean paste and ginger.

RAMEN-LIKE DISHES

Although these dishes are not quite ramen, they’ll still be able to satisfy the most intense need for a ramen fix.

Abura Soba: The name of this soupless noodle dish translates to “oil noodles.” It consists of cooked ramen noodles dressed with flavored oil and tare (usually shoyu). It often comes topped with an egg, and diners are meant to stir everything together in the bowl to form a creamy, fatty, thickened sauce. One can also add vinegar, chili oil and other shit before slurping. Hot peppers, mayonnaise, fried noodles, chopped garlic and pork fat are also crowd favorites to add in.

Chanpon: This originated in Nagasaki and is made by boiling thick noodles directly in a thick pork and seafood soup. It’s viscous, and eats more like stew than ramen.

Hiyashi Chuka: This literally means “cold Chinese.” As such it’s a dish made with cold ramen noodles and various toppings like fried egg, ham, carrot, cucumber and chicken. It is usually dressed in a light soy-vinegar sauce. I’ve even seen fish sauce used in some versions around NYC.

Mazemen: This is a hearty “dry” ramen, characterized by thick noodles and weird toppings like cheese. Similar to Abura Soba, this is essentially cooked noodles with a small amount of strongly flavored sauce on the side for dipping. Toppings and sauces can vary a great deal, and are often experimental in nature.

Tantan-Men: This is an off-shoot of Chinese dandan noodles. Based on a pork broth, it comes with a scoop of heavily spiced ground pork and is generally served with bok choy and/or spinach.

Tsukemen: This, like Mazemen, is also a “dipping” ramen. Cold, undressed (nekkit) noodles are served alongside a hot, concentrated ramen broth. You dip the noodles into a bowl of broth as you eat, grabbing the toppings whenever you choose to.

Yakisoba: This is the Japanese version of Chinese fried noodles. It’s made with egg noodles that get stir-fried with veggies and occasionally meat or seafood. This shit then gets hit with a Worcestershire style anchovy and vegetable sauce. It’s often topped with shaved bonito flakes and pickled ginger (beni shoga).

FUSION RAMEN

All around NYC we are seeing various kinds of fusion ramen items being offered, which makes a lot of sense given that the history of ramen in Japan involves a lot of Japanese-Chinese fusion.

However some of the more wild examples I’ve seen in NYC include:

Korean-inspired kimchi ramen (Mokbar):

Thai green curry ramen (Bassanova):

Flavors common to Burmese cuisine that feature coconut milk in the broth base (Tabata):

Indian-inspired massaman curry ramen, even complete with potatoes and carrots and (Yasha):

Italian spaghetti ramen, with pepper oil, arugula and crispy porchetta (Maialino):

Thanksgiving turkey ramen, with gravy, mushrooms, stuffing and cranberries, of course (Talde):

And Jamaican jerk chicken ramen (Miss Lily’s 9A):

There are even ramen burgers (L&L Drive Inn, among others)…

…and now ramen cake (courtesy of my wife, The Cake Dealer).

So that about does it here. If ramen isn’t your thing, but soup most definitely IS your thing, as a general matter, then there’s always pho, bun bo hue and laksa out there to soothe your hot soup needs in the cold winter weather that’s about to strike.