All posts by Johnny Prime

Sweet & Spicy Pork Sandwich

April 6, 2014 Johnny Prime 3 Comments

I whipped this bitch up after a surprise trip to the Mosner family meat processing plant for a tour and butchery class. Check out my write-up of that shit HERE.

Once we got home, I was itching to try some of what we just worked on, so I took the stew meat scraps and threw them into the slow cooker with some apple shit and some spice shit.

I set it on low and slow. Four hours later the result was amazing. My wife and I threw it onto a sandwich with some pickled cabbage and a spicy mayo. Check out the recipe below assholes:

What you need:

about a pound, or pound and a half, of pork stew meat
apple moonshine or brandy (3/4 cup)
can of apple sparkling water (12oz) or apple juice
one serving of apple sauce (unsweetened – 4oz)
2 tbsp brown sugar
3 cloves of garlic (cut each into thirds or quarters)
1 small to medium sized onion (halved)
kosher salt to taste
crushed red pepper to taste
cloves (about 10)
1 small cinnamon stick
fresh cracked black pepper to taste
handful of baby carrots, sliced thin
shredded cabbage
white vinegar
mayo
habanero hot sauce or sri racha sauce
sliced jalapeno
sub/hero bread

THE MEAT

1) Mix the apple sauce, apple brandy, and apple sparkling water to use as a braising liquid base. Add to the slow cooker.

2) Drop your stew meat into the slow cooker.

20140405_182207 — stew meat swimming in the slow cooker

3) Add salt, pepper, crushed red pepper, cloves, cinnamon, garlic, and onion into the slow cooker.

Me, magic-wanding in a mix of kosher salt and crushed red pepper

4) Set slow cooker to 4 hours on LOW. Mix that shit around every so often while it’s going.

5) When finished, pull out of the liquid and cut the meat into manageable chunks for a sandwich.

NOTE: This meat is going to come out sweet if you go light on the spice, so what I did below was create some extras to balance the sweet with a little kick of spice. Be a man – do it.

THE TOPPING

1) Get some tupperware and put the carrots, cabbage and white vinegar into it.

2) Add some spices as you see fit.

3) Let that shit sit and soak until it’s party time.

THE DRESSING

1) Add habanero sauce or sri racha sauce to mayo as you see fit.

2) Mix.

NOTE: if you have the ability, like my wife did, then you should make your own mayo from fucking scratch. How? Whisk together 1 egg yolk, a little blob of dijon mustard, a little white vinegar, a pinch of salt, a little olive oil, and a squirt of lemon juice until it becomes like a nice aioli. That shit will have a little zing of acid to cut the sweetness and spice of the other sandwich elements.

PUT ALL THAT FUCKING SHIT TOGETHER

1) Toast your bread to your liking.

2) Assemble the sandwich by first dressing each side of the bread with the mayo/aioli.

3) Add your meat and some of the pickled veggie topping. Here’s where you throw on some of those sliced jalapenos.

4) Eat that shit.

Commentary, Product Reviews

Mosner Meat & Butchery Class

April 6, 2014 Johnny Prime 3 Comments

For our fifth wedding anniversary, my awesome wife surprised the shit out of me with a butchery class and tour at the Mosner family meat processing plant in Hunt’s Point in the Bronx.

The business has been around for nearly six decades, starting with meat deliveries from the back of a station wagon until the brand slowly built up to become a well known, high-end meat distributor for some of the area’s finest steakhouses and meat purveyors.

Three grandchildren of the original Mosner start-up (Seth, Jessica, and Ben) run the incredibly informative tour and butchery class on Saturdays. The first thing you’ll do is suit up in a butcher’s coat and some gloves. Just a word of advice – bundle up if you do this. Inside it is just about freezing.

It starts out with introductions and some information from Jessica about the company, what they do, the history, etc. Then comes an awesome, testosterone building meat chant in call-and-response format. MEAT MEAT MEAT! This is a shot of Ben pulling us in for the huddle just before the chanting began.

Once inside, the learning begins. Seth and Ben informed us about the lamb and veal they deal in, including how it is treated at the farm (they enjoy a stress free and healthy life, which makes for better flavors), how it is slaughtered (with the utmost standards of humaneness), and how it is processed (skilled artists and craftsmen butchers).

Check out some of the other beautiful decor here:

A peek underneath the skirt of some hanging lamb

Next up, Jessica runs through some of the important (and often times confusing to those not in the know) labels that the meat industry applies to various products.

“Antibiotic Free” vs “No Antibiotics,” for example (“No Antibiotics” means NO ANTIBIOTICS have ever been in the animal. “Antibiotic Free” means that there were no traces of antibiotics in the animal at the time of slaughter, but that doesn’t mean the animal never had any antibiotics in its lifetime). Here’s a nice little print-out that they gave the class: not everything we learned is on here, but this is a great start.

After this, we watched Chris, AKA “Da Butcher,” perform a lightning fast demo of his amazing butchery skills as he broke down the roast and rib ends of a pig in what had to be under 3 minutes WITH pauses in place to show us and explain what he was doing.

"Da Butcher" in action — “Da Butcher” in action

Da Butcher's Artwork — Da Butcher’s Artwork

Then we had an opportunity to buy some high end meat at super wholesale prices. I’m talking PRIME beef for $9.99/lb. They even had an entire trailer full of game meats, with lots of harder to find stuff like elk, duck, venison, kangaroo, gator, snake, ostrich, pheasant, squab and others. Are you FUCKING serious?!?? I was in heaven! We decided to get some rarities like duck sausage and confit duck legs, but I could have easily blown the mortgage on this delicious shit.

Now for the hands-on stuff. I had to put my camera down, so there are no “action” photos, but we all got to do what “Da Butcher” did in his demo: namely, slice up the roast and rib of the pig.

We were instructed on everything from the best way to hold the knife, to how to properly get the meat off the bone without nicking or slicing up the good bits. Afterwards, we took all our cuts over to the vaccum sealer and put them into boxes that were pre-labeled with our names on them. That’s right – you get to bring home all that delicious piggy meat that you just butchered!!!

I watched as the staff expertly portioned and wrapped the prime stuff that other classmates had purchased.

"Da Butcher" trims some of the fat off before it heads to the sealer — “Da Butcher” trims some of the fat off before it heads to the sealer

Porterhouses coming off the vacuum sealer

Then Ben took me around to show me some of the offal that they sell as well. I’m talking everything – liver, heart, bones, sweetbreads – you name it, they sling it.

As you may have guessed, I’ve reviewed some of their steakhouse customers, and I have to tell you: there is a stark and obvious correlation. The places that use Mosner to source their meat all have excellent ratings on my leaderboard.

What an amazing gift! If you guys get a chance, you should definitely go as well. Not only do you learn a lot about the meat proteins you are eating, but you will come away with a great appreciation for the hard work and effort that goes into bringing these products to your dinner table. My wife knows that I secretly wish I were a butcher, so this was a real treat for me. Look – I even got a participation award.

Once we got home, I was itching to try some of what we just worked on, so I took the stew meat scraps and threw them into the slow cooker with apple moonshine, apple sauce, apple flavored water, and a bunch of mulling type spices like cinnamon and cloves.

I set it on low and slow. Four hours later the result was amazing. My wife and I threw it onto a sandwich with some pickled cabbage and a spicy mayo. Check out the recipe HERE.

Ramen, Union Square/Flatiron

Terakawa Ramen

April 1, 2014 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

UPDATE: THIS LOCATION IS NOW CLOSED!

Terakawa Ramen is the kind of tiny joint that you pop into for a quick fix if you’re in the area. I wouldn’t go out of my way to come here, but they DO do a great job with the basics. At $9 the Terakawa Ramen is a steal. The bowl is huge, and it is really tasty. Stick with the basics though. My wife tried the Mayu black garlic oil ramen, which was essentially the Terakawa ramen but with a heavy layer of burnt tasting black garlic oil that was a bit ashy in texture and look. The Terakawa was much better. The noodles are square in shape, straight, and a nice texture. The scallions are cut properly, and the pork is soft and thinly sliced. Definitely worth a try, and I would certainly go back for seconds, but I wouldn’t go out of my way for it like I would for Bassanova or Totto.

We also tried an order of the Kuro Buta sausage. I was hoping for something a bit different, but it was still tasty. Ultimately not a necessary item. Go for extra pork in the ramen instead.

Recipes

The Italian Peasant Sandwich

March 25, 2014 Johnny Prime 2 Comments

I grew up eating some classic Italian peasant food; recipes that were handed down from the old country to the new country. One such dish was escarole and beans. My mom used to make it so that it was like a porridge or thick soup. I thought: maybe I could make it less watery and throw it onto a sandwich with some braised pork. Below is what I came up with. I call it the Italian peasant sandwich.

What you need:

1 lb Boneless fatty pork meat (I used country style ribs here, but pork butt works too)
1 head of thoroughly rinsed escarole
1 can of cannellini beans (white kidney beans)
Crusty style sandwich bread – I would go with two 10-inch rolls
5 Cloves of garlic (2 for the braise and 3 for the sautee)
Olive oil
Crispy fried onions or shallots
Unsalted butter
Slow cooker or crock pot
A few sprigs of rosemary
Cheap white wine
Onion flakes
Onion powder
Crushed red pepper
3 Thai chili peppers
Salt
Black pepper

Step 1: Sear the pork quickly in olive oil after coating all sides with salt & pepper. This will lock in the pork’s juices when it braises. LEAVE THE PAN DIRTY – you will utilize that porky brown goodness in a later step.

Step 2: Place pork into slow cooker with 2 cloves crushed garlic and wine, just enough to cover the meat. Maybe half to 3/4 of a bottle. Add salt, pepper, fresh chilis (cut into halves or thirds), onion powder, onion flakes, crushed red pepper, and rosemary. Set to cook 3 hours on high.

Step 3: Rinse your escarole to get all the fucking sand off. This green leaf is more “Sandy” than a chick with no arms and legs on a beach. Dry the leaves after rinsing.

Step 4: Sautee the escarole with olive oil and 3 crushed garlic cloves on medium heat, putting it right back into the pan you just used to sear the pork. Start with half the escarole, let it wilt a little, and then add the rest. Trust me it will all end up fitting into a normal large sized pan.

Step 5: Once the escarole is half wilted add the can of beans, plus the liquid in the can, and turn the stove to high. You want to boil off all the excess liquid while still retaining the flavor, infusing it into the leaves. Cook the liquid out, and add salt and pepper to taste as it finishes.

NOTE: As an alternative to adding the beans to the escarole in the traditional way, you could puree the beans into a spread, which you can then smear onto the bread.

Step 6: Pull the pork meat out of the slow cooker and pour the excess braising liquid into a wide sauce pan or a wide based pot.

Step 7: Add a tablespoon or two of unsalted butter to the sauce pan and reduce the braising liquid into a thickened sauce. While you wait, pull the pork meat apart with a pair of forks.

Step 8: Toast the sandwich bread and slice it open. Fill it with escarole and pork, and top it with crispy onions and the sauce made from the braising liquid.

Step 9: Eat, shit, repeat.

Recipes

Garlic & Rosemary Rib Eye

March 23, 2014 Johnny Prime 6 Comments

Since we had to pay Uncle Sam a fat wad of dough for tax season, I figured I’d save a little money and do a steak from home. Since I was in the spirit of giving, I also figured I may as well share the process with you meat-heads.

Here’s what you’ll need:

A Rib Eye Steak
A Few Sprigs Of Rosemary
A Few Tablespoons Of Soy Sauce
A Cup Of Olive Oil
Three Cloves Of Garlic
Course Salt
Black Pepper
Crushed Red Pepper
Onion Powder
A Frying Pan
Tongs
A Source Of Heat
A Plate
A Cutting Board
Something Sharp
Balls

You’ll also need at least one eye and one ear, to watch and hear the demonstration I put together below:

And no post is complete without a smattering of food porn photos. Here are some before, during and after shots:

Eastern European, Midtown East, Press Reviews, Restaurant Reviews

Pepela – Georgian Cuisine

March 22, 2014 Johnny Prime 2 Comments

I was recently invited to a press dinner at Pepela, a very elegant but non-stuffy Georgian restaurant on 30th Street just east of Park Avenue. I didn’t know what to expect, really. Not only have I not regularly indulged in eastern European, Scandinavian or Russian/northern Asian cuisine, but I’m also new to the press dinner thing. I must say: after tonight, I’m a fan of both Georgian cuisine AND press dinners.

Pepela is a beautiful restaurant. I thought maybe the name meant butterfly. That’s just a guess though from the decor on the back wall.

However, a quick google translate “language detect” search said that pepela means “ash” in Slovenian.

The entry way feels like you are stepping into a fancy brownstone.

A short hallway walk takes you to an upscale bar/lounge area, which partially overlooks the downstairs dining room area nearest to the small stage that’s set up for live music.

This place is great for something like bridal parties or girly brunches, for sure. But it’s great for date night too. I think I even overheard something about a cover band. A band was setting up while we were on our way out.

White brick walls line the dining room downstairs. Purple toned up-lighting splashes color all around, giving the place a distinct lounge feel, but without the loud music blaring in your ears (loud lounges suck once you hit your 30s).

Upstairs there are elegant light fixtures, shimmering chandeliers, columnal white wainscoting and bold crown molding on the walls. It’s bright and clean. Dare I say… sexy? I hate that word when used relating to food… but I guess I’m talking about atmosphere. Here – just look at some of the artwork that throws back to the sexified 80’s ideal of Victorian-era erotica.

Okay so on to the good shit. The important shit. The fucking food.

The first things that passed into our digestive system were some drinks. A lovely tarragon and citrus flavored soda called Natakhtari was bright green with a delicious and herbaceous taste. Where can I get more of this awesomeness?

Next was a proprietary in-house Georgian vodka-based drink with a pomegranate and orange flavor that transformed with a simple squeeze of lime. Refreshing and fruity. Not too strong, not too light. Really a perfect cocktail: especially for you broads out there. It was called a chacha pom.

Then came a starter plate with some warm, semi-flat quick bread (they look like sharks).

First on the starter plate was eggplant wrapped around a hummus-like walnut paste puree. I liked it a lot. Even my wife, who absolutely hates eggplant, was able to eat it.

Next was a beet spread. This was mixed with onions and herbs. Really nice balance of sweet and savory going on here, and it went nicely with the bread.

Last were peppers stuffed with walnuts, pomegranate, carrots, spices and herbs. This was my favorite of the three. The roasted pepper flavor really added a nice earthy note to drive home the nutty excellence of the stuffing.

By that point in the meal I was already sold on Georgian food. Unique drinks, with tasty and light starters? Sure! The starter plates were surprisingly Mediterranean in flavor. Delicious and totally unexpected, yet somehow familiar. If I had to make one suggestion here: it could use some crunch to mix up the texture. Maybe some thick cut, crispy fried potato slices as an alternative to the bread? But then maybe that would take it out of the realm of traditional Georgian food? What the hell do I know. I really was fine with it as-is.

Next came the cheese bread called khachapuri. To a grease bag EYEtalian-American like me, this was sorta like a white pizza. It was made with very light, mild and melty cheeses though, on crisp yet soft dough.

For my taste it could’ve been a slight bit crispier, but maybe that’s just me subconsciously transforming it into pizza in my boot-shaped-country head.

Last was a plate of veal soup dumplings called khinkali. These were like doughy gift packages of spiced meat, accompanied by a great soup broth inside that packed some really robust, home-style flavors.

You’re supposed to eat these fuckers by hand, which I love, because I’m a man and I have a base-born NEED to eat with my hands. It’s genetic; it’s in a man’s DNA. Shit maybe it’s even evolutionary. (Pay no attention to my girly, pinkish-purple shirt…)

Ridiculous video.

Wow. Pepela… what a great build up from start to finish. The lightness of the starters awakened my taste buds and prepared them for the punch of the entree. I loved everything, and I’ll definitely be back to try some of the other tasty menu items. Georgian food has a great future in the belly of this meat man!

PEPELA
104 E. 30th St.
New York, NY 10016

American, Commentary, Food Halls, Italian, Midtown West, Ramen, Restaurant Reviews, Spanish

Gotham West Market

March 15, 2014 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Hell’s Kitchen NYC is really starting to put meaning into the KITCHEN aspect of the neighborhood’s name. Not only have many great restaurants popped up recently, but now there are half a dozen ramen shops, several awesome burger joints, and even a smattering of small niche joints serving things like like Korean fried chicken or Vietnamese banh mi sandwiches. The most recent thing on my radar is Gotham West Market. It’s basically an upscale food court featuring a bunch of really nice pop-up restaurants, a gourmet food market, and even a store selling kitchen items, cooking gear, and baking supplies.

I first came here to try the Ivan Ramen Slurp Shop.

My wife and I tried the Shio and Shoyu styles. They were both good, but they contained green onion cut in such a way that it became overbearing and difficult to pluck off of the noodles. I like a standard cross cut to my scallions. This “long ways” cut sucks. The soup base was good, on the other hand, and the rye noodles were delicious.

My wife went back two times without me and tried most of the other spots in there, like The Cannibal, El Colmado, Little Chef, The Brooklyn Kitchen, Genuine Roadside, and Court Street Grocers Sandwich Shop. Poke around her Instagram feed to see some of her escapades. Or simply hit up the #gwmarket tag on there. Here are a couple of collages of her pics:

So today we went in for lunch, which was my wife’s 4th time going in 3 weeks, since I have been dying to try some of the stuff I’ve seen on Instagram from El Colmado and The Cannibal. I’ll take these fuckers down one at a time for you below.

THE CANNIBAL
We sat down to a nice beer and a Bloody Mary to start. The Bloody came with some pickled items on top – a beet, a cucumber, and a pepper.

We ordered three items here. The first was an octopus terrine, garnished with some pickled fennel and dill. This was so amazing, especially after having such a shitty plate of octopus two nights earlier at a local Long Island restaurant that completely fucked the octo up, turning it into rubber. THIS, on the other hand, was a masterpiece. Soft, tender, juicy, and nicely dressed – just like a prom date. One of the best octo preparations I’ve ever tasted.

Next up was the pig head terrine. Essentially a head cheese of sorts. It was really tender and flavorful, and it even had some capers jammed in there too for a nice bite of brine. They served it with some crispy bread, lemon butter, and herbs. Delicious.

Last was the lamb tartare. You can see below that it’s sitting on top of the little mustard smear that mixed well with the flavorful meat. In the back were the little planks of lettuce upon which we spread the tartare before shoving into our mouths.

EL COLMADO
I was excited to have some shaved-by-hand cured piggy, so we started with an order of sliced Serrano ham. Not too salty, very soft and delicious. I expected nothing less in terms of quality when it comes to Chef Seamus Mullen, of The Next Iron Chef fame.

In keeping with the theme from The Cannibal, we doubled down on octopus and lamb items. First is the lamb meatballs. Succulent, juicy, and rich with lamby goodness.

The octopus here was grilled to perfection and served with some vinegary fingerling potatoes. Very nice tasting, and beautifully plated I might add. Needless to say, all memory of terrible octopus from the local Long Island place has been erased. This was superb.

Well – not all memory is erased. We still need to remember that is WAS bad, and that we will never go back there again. Ahh, El Colmado & The Cannibal – you made my day. Two of the finest places I’ve been to in a long time.

So anyway, we finished up at El Colmado with a nice saffron flan for dessert. Perfect texture, and great flavor.

So what’s the moral of this story? GO TO GOTHAM WEST MARKET ASAP!

And if you like burgers, then check out my Genuine Roadside review.

There’s something there for everyone. I snapped a shitload of pics from all over in there – I’ll leave you with that:

GOTHAM WEST MARKET
600 11th Ave.
New York, NY 10036

Korean, Midtown West, Press Reviews, Restaurant Reviews

Madangsui Korean BBQ

March 15, 2014 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

Madangsui is a great spot for quality Korean BBQ, and Korean food in general. My wife and I came on a Friday after work to give it a try. It’s located on 35th Street just east of 6th Avenue. Not quite IN K-Town, but close enough. And slightly removed from the craziness of the main K-Town hub. Here’s what the joint looks like outside and inside:

As is common practice in Korean cuisine, the banchan comes out first… an array of pickled veggies and greenery to wet the appetite and for adding to your BBQ meats, lettuce wraps or rice dishes.

They also brought out some fluffy egg in a small cast iron pot, and a crab and veggie soup. The egg was perfect. The soup was hearty and rich, and the crab gave it a nice flavor of the sea:

We actually started with some chicken bibimbap. It was really tasty with the fried egg on top. I just wish the rice was a little bit crispier from cooking in the clay pot some more. The little crispy brown bits are the best!

For the bbq portion we had two different meats. First, the pork belly. Nice, juicy quarter inch goodness:

We also had some spicy, marinated rib eye. Lookin’ good!

It was seriously good quality meat. Check out the menu and see for yourself:

Yeah that’s right. Jowls. I ordered it, but our waitress said it wasn’t very popular. I asked “Yeah, but is it good?” She replied that she has never tried it, so I held off. Next time.

Our waitress fired up the meat for us at the table…

You know what? Fuck it… This is something you need to see in video. Here:

Once it was finished on the grill to perfect doneness we slapped the meat onto some lettuce wraps with some toppings. Delicious. The lettuce adds a nice crunch and cool, lightness to contrast with the meat.

That’s all I’ve got for you hungry assholes out there. If you’re looking for a good quality KBBQ joint that isn’t in the epicenter of the K-Town hustle, then this is definitely the place to go. I will definitely be back… specifically for the jowls.

MADANGSUI
35 W. 35th St.
New York, NY 10001

Recipes

Homemade Ramen – Just Like The Real Thing

March 9, 2014 Johnny Prime Leave a comment

My wife recently went to a food expo at the Javitz Center, where she sampled some ramen that contained black garlic oil. She was blown away by it, so naturally I started looking for black garlic oil online. I couldn’t find anything like a bottle of it. But I DID find this on Amazon, so I ordered it:

I figured it can’t be any worse than Maruchan, right? Shit – maybe it would even be good.

So the shipment came. I had a serious hankering for good hearty ramen, REAL ramen, but I didn’t feel like getting back on the train to the city to go find a decent bowl (there’s nothing good out on Long Island in terms of ramen – same goes for pho and Vietnamese food in general). So I decided to doll-up some of this instant ramen with some ground pork and various other cuts of pork.

What you see below is center cut pork chops (top/back), boneless country style pork ribs (center) and pork belly (the ground pork was not pictured). That slab of bacon isn’t anything special either, by the way. My grocery store doesn’t normally sell big hunks of pork belly, so I picked up a $4 package of Hormel brand “salt pork.” I figured if I cooked it correctly, it would taste like the real thing.

So what did I do to the meat? I prepared the pork by using a slow cooker for about 6 hours on low. I filled the pot with about a half cup of soy sauce, 2 Tbsp duck sauce, 2 Tbsp sugar in the raw simple syrup, 2 tsp Chinese 5-spice, a stick of cinnamon along with a few shakes of ground cinnamon, 3 red chili peppers, 2 cloves of garlic, 1 tsp ginger powder, a few shakes of garlic powder, 1 tsp Sriracha sauce, a shake of nutmeg, 1 roughly cut scallion shoot, and about 8 or 10 cloves. I whisked it all together with 2.5 pints of water. At first I was thinking this was too much liquid, but as it turns out it was just the right amount. You’ll see why later.

Then all I had to do was wait… But I bore easily. So I went out and got a little drunk with some friends at a local St. Patrick’s Day parade. There’s nothing quite like day-drinking. My wife was at a baby shower, so I would have just been sitting around playing with myself or watching horror flicks anyway. She picked me up after the shower and the timing was perfect. I came home to this, which I scooped out of the slow cooker:

I tasted it. Holy shit. Fucking perfect! Four beers and two shots didn’t take me off my cooking game, either. With all that excess slow-cooker liquid that I thought was too much, I decided to make a concentrated reduction to use later on as a dressing of sorts for plain noodles, or for SOMETHING. I’d figure out a way to use it because it was delicious. But then I had this brilliant idea to make the freeze-dried instant ramen noodles taste better: I boiled them in the slow-cooker liquid as it reduced. As a bonus, the starch helped to thicken the reduction as well.

In the meantime I cooked the ground pork with soy sauce and garlic, and made the ramen broth, which essentially was just the seasoning packets from the ramen package + water + heat. I also sliced some fresh scallions and some baby bella mushrooms for garnish, and sliced some boiled eggs that we already had in the fridge.

When we put it all together, we popped open the little package of elusive black garlic oil. Here’s the end result:

It came out a slight bit salty, so next time I will adjust seasonings accordingly. But if I ordered this in a NYC ramen shop for $15 I would be none the wiser that it was made with instant packets, and I would love it.

Burgers, Full Points for Flavor, Queens, Rib Eye, Steakhouse Reviews

M. Wells Steakhouse

March 6, 2014 Johnny Prime 4 Comments

M. Wells Steakhouse overall score: 91

My wife and I came here with the good people from Tabelog to see what the big hype was all about. I was drooling at the images of the bone-in burger made to look like a tomahawk rib chop. I figured that a place this creative with the presentation would hopefully have some quality food to match.

Flavor: 10
What superb meat! Really nicely cooked for such a massive hunk of meat. We had the Wagyu rib eye to share among three people, along with the bone-in burger for good measure (for my wife). This beef definitely comes in as one of the best steaks I have ever had. The pictures speak volumes – take a look below. The burger was one of the best I’ve ever had; and the rib eye was expertly seasoned, it had a great char/crisp on the outer edges, and it was perfectly medium rare from end to end. I couldn’t believe this was achieved on such a huge, thick slab of meat. I didn’t think I would like it slathered with a saucy cheese, but it actually worked to accent the flavor.

Choice of Cuts & Quality Available: 10
You have a good set of choices here. There was a chateau briand, two types of Wagyu rib eye, and some regular type cuts. All top notch in terms of quality. This place is definitely not short-changing anyone on the beef.

Portion Size & Plating: 9
Portions were all pretty good with the exception of the geoduck and uni appetizers. Those felt a bit too small for the prices. The rib eye we shared clocked in at 55oz; massive. The burger was definitely large enough to satisfy any burger craving too.

Price: 9
We had lots to drink and eat (three apps, a side, a steak, a burger, a dessert, four coffees, two bottles of wine, a cocktail, and a beer), yet our bill was only $450. Not too shabby for four people!

Bar: 8
The bar is pretty cool here, and it has a nice, interesting cocktail menu. I sipped on a “cow’s kiss” – which was like a spicy martini with a skewer of pickled veal tongue as garnish. Pretty nice. The bar itself is nicely decorated, however I don’t think I would find myself trekking out to LIC for a drink unless I was specifically going here for dinner.

We were also treated to a nice after dinner drink of sweet, house made maple bourbon/whiskey. It was perfect with our dessert.

Specials and Other Meats: 9
There is a lot to choose from here, in the event you don’t want to man-up and eat a real steak. I don’t think the waiter read us any special menu items that I recall, but there’s enough goodness on the menu to satisfy any cravings for something unique. We asked a ton of questions about items we didn’t end up ordering.

Apps, Sides & Desserts: 8
We tried a nice array of items here. First I will start with the apps. We had the geoduck, which came sliced thin and served with radish and pickled green stuff. It tasted like the sea, strongly so, but heavily laden with the taste of pickle. This was my first time trying the phallic food, so I didn’t really know what to expect. I’m not necessarily a fan of this preparation, but I can respect the simplicity of it, and the sea-borne flavors.

Next was the uni appetizer. Essentially two sea urchins served atop a custard made from lobster broth. It was really interesting, but again not particularly my cup of tea. Also very fishy (not that there is anything wrong with it – just potent).

The third and final app was a Korean breakfast plate, which came with roasted, soft, fatty bacon; sweet potatoes; a link of blood sausage; kimchi with a fried egg on top; and friend shrimp dumplings (think breaded, deep fried fish balls). This was a great platter. The bacon was superb. Very soft, yet very smoky; somewhere between regular bacon and roasted belly. The blood sausage was in the style of English or Scottish food – hearty and robust, slightly grainy or mealy, but packed with flavor. The rest was as you would expect.

On the side, we had the sunchokes and raisins. It was delicious, but topped with bonito flakes that gave it a jarring fishy taste. I wasn’t crazy about that, but it did make you feel like you were eating some sort of meaty seafood dish rather than the light, artichoke-meets-cauliflower flavor you expect from a sunchoke.

For dessert we had the chocolate charcuterie, which was essentially a “sausage” log of fudge with spiced caramel inside, beside two small loaves of banana bread, served with a custard spread and a berry compote. Delicious! And a very clever presentation. Only suggestion here: make the truss string easier to disrobe from around the chocolate sausage log.

Seafood Selection: 9
There’s fresh fish swimming around in the large marble tub sink just behind the counter in the kitchen. If fresh seafood is what you want, then this seems like the place to get it, as it is literally swimming in the kitchen. They have the standard shellfish and raw bar items that you expect from good steak joints. But they also have a great selection of not-so-common seafood items; shit you don’t normally see on steakhouse menus (like the geoduck and uni, for example). Props on that!

Service: 10
Our waiter, Michael, was really fantastic when it came to describing all the great menu items we had questions about. The “wine captain” made some really nice suggestions to pair with our courses as well, although both bottles left a significant amount of sediment in my glass (one of which I couldn’t finish). Perhaps it would be worth while to set a decanter or filtered pouring apparatus down beside the table for when bottles like these are ordered.

OH YEAH! Table breads were nice – one was a hot roll with butter, and the other was a pretzel bun served with dijon mustard. They came in a little bread sack.

Ambiance: 9
I must say, they did a great job decorating this old garage. The high ceilings give way to beautiful old skylights, and the new-modern steakhouse/slaughterhouse decor lends itself to a great look and vibe inside. The open concept kitchen really makes you feel like you are getting a personal experience with the chef and kitchen staff. The only downside is the small dining space and the lack of large, spacious booths. Otherwise, this place is great and did a wonderful job with the space. I imagine they will have outdoor seating on the patio once the weather gets nice too.

Just a quick note here – we had a celebrity sighting while dining: the highly polarizing squeaky wheel known as Michael Moore, of Bush-bashing, anti-gun, pro-Cuba fame. Here he is, looming over my shoulder while waiting for his table, like a large Thanksgiving Day parade float, donning his characteristic baseball cap and cantankerous mug.