Category Archives: Restaurant Reviews

El Colmado Butchery

My wife and I strolled into this joint after reading about some of the stuff they had going on. We had already just eaten lunch, so we only dabbled into some snack items. However, it is worth writing up because they offer a lot of really awesome deals and humble items for such an overpriced and pretentious area of the city (Meatpacking). When we walked up at about 4pm, there was actually a bouncer from Brass Monkey preventing people in line from blocking the El Colmado door. That’s a bit early to be queueing up on a Saturday…

el colmado outside

Check it out. We tried the “bone broth,” which technically should be called a stock since it is made from bones and not just meat. Since this item is becoming a big food trend lately, I really hope that people learn the lingo and stop calling it a “bone broth.” If bones are used, it’s a fuckin’ stock.

el colmado sign

It was pretty tasty. A bit salty, perhaps over-reduced or too concentrated, but the flavors were reminiscent of pho because of some of the spices used, like clove or perhaps cinnamon.

el colmado bone broth

Next we had a pair of smoked deviled eggs. I thought it was okay, but my wife wasn’t a fan of the texture and consistency. These were $2 a piece (pictured below are two pieces, one full egg – $4).

el colmado eggs

The coolest part of eating here was that our seats at the counter were placed in front of the glass case of butcher style offerings. Take a look at what we were sitting above:

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el colmado duck

el colmado lamb

el colmado pancetta

el colmado strip

The counter top has all sorts of savory candies in jars too, like jerky and olives:

el colmado jerky

el colmado olives

I certainly need to get back down here when I have a bigger appetite.

EL COLMADO BUTCHERY IS CLOSED

Empire Diner

NOTE: THIS JOINT IS NOW  UNDER NEW OWNERSHIP

Chef Amanda Freitag’s upscale diner (which I like to refer to as a “finer”) really delivers some solid menu items. My wife and I popped in for lunch when it was crowded and took a comfortable seat at the large, old fashioned art-deco inspired bar area.

empire diner interior

empire diner eat

We started with some cocktails. I had a jalapeño bloody Mary, and my wife had a riff on the Pimm’s Cup cocktail. Both were masterfully mixed. Look at the size of the basil floating in my wife’s drink! It was a mutant leaf.

empire diner drinks

Our meal came out a bit backwards, as the pop tarts arrived first, and we sort of assumed they were more of a dessert item. I guess they are there for the brunch menu. They were filled with apricot jam and had a nice, light texture to the strudel-style dough pocket. Very nice, and actually kind of filling for only $6 a pair.

empire diner pop tart 1

empire diner pop tart 2

I had the burger. This is a top contender. It comes garnished with red onion, cheddar cheese, pickles and a Big Mac style special sauce. Really tasty, and the gooey cheese is enough to solve any problems in the event your patty comes out cooked too much. At first, I thought mine was a little beyond medium, but it was fine once I got into the center a bit more. The bun is brioche style, but it isn’t flaky or weak. I prefer a potato bun, but this was fine.

empire diner burger 1

empire diner burger cut

This is a great buy at $13, because you get the salt and pepper fries in a pretty good portion size on the side as well. And let me just say: these fries were fucking amazing.

empire diner fries

My wife ordered the fish and chips. The portion size was pretty large, although her plate came with less fries than my burger plate. The fish was a large single piece that was enveloped in a really nice batter. My wife referred to it as “fish Wellington.” The fish itself was a cod; nice and flaky, and perfectly cooked.

empire diner fish chips

Burger & Barrel

This place easily comes in as one of my favorite burgers in the city. I tried the bash burger (bacon and onion jam), and the classic (lettuce and tomato). Both came with American cheese as the standard, and both were fucking amazing: great bun, and astounding meat flavor. The fries were perfectly cooked and seasoned as well, and the batter on the onion rings was so crisp and delicious.. I’ll definitely be dining here again, especially for the prime rib dinner.

The bash burger was so good that you didn’t miss the crunch from the lettuce or the coolness of the tomato:

B&B bash

The classic was firing on all cylinders. Every aspect of this thing worked. Tomato was sliced a little thicker than I normally like, but it was not unwieldy because the other stuff was all the right thickness.

B&B classic

It’s no wonder this place, which is run by the same folks at Bowery Meat Company, is running away with all sorts of burger awards.

B&B trophies

UPDATE 4/20/15

I went back yesterday with my wife and my parents to celebrate me and my wife’s 6th wedding anniversary.

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We did the prime rib dinner for four, which you will need to reserve in advance because they need lots of time to prep the roast (I think it cooks for 8 hours). Check out the menu:

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We started with a few brews since we were walking around a lot that afternoon and needed some refreshments:

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The family style apps were pretty delicious. First were these little chicken lollipops. Super crispy skin, some Korean style BBQ sauce drizzled over with sesame seeds and some greens. These are addicting. I only wish there were eight instead of six in the order, that way we each could have eaten two. They’re a little too good to stop at just one, despite the massive amount of food yet to come.

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The tuna tartare was nice, light and refreshing. It was topped with an avocado spread and served with waffle-cut potato chips. Everything was just right on this dish.

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Next up were the individually ordered salads. Since there were three to choose from, we had one of each and then an extra that was doubled. So we ordered two of the beet salads. The beets were perfectly roasted, and the toasted walnuts gave good texture and crunch to the salad. The goat cheese was so soft and velvety, and the orange segments added a citrus pop that really made this salad stand out as the best of the three.

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The kale salad had butternut squash, faro and cranberries. This was dressed nicely with a honey mustard vinaigrette.

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The last of the salads was apple and arugula with shaved fennel, pine nuts and parmigiano, lightly dressed with a light apple vinegar.

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The star of the show is this Creekstone Farms roasted prime rib.

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This is a LOT of beef for just four people. The waiter said that it comes out to about 14oz per person, but that is a serious understatement. I think my cut alone, which wasn’t as big as my dad’s, was about 24oz.

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So thick and juicy. The seasoning got way down into the meat, and the crust of spices along the outside edges was incredible. The fat was pretty much all edible meat jello – so tasty. Not one bite became monotonous or boring, as is the case many times with prime rib. This had a ton of character. I can’t even describe to you how amazing the restaurant smelled when they carried this bad boy out to us. They also served it with two sauces: bordelaise and peppercorn poivre sauce. Both were great but I tended to hit the peppercorn sauce a little more often.

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Even the sides were amazing here. First, I’ve never tasted a tater tot so good in my life. They were perfectly crisp, and herbed up nice with rosemary flavor.

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The brussels sprouts were crispy and light, but packed a ton of flavor. I could eat this like a snack while watching TV.

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The spinach was perfectly seasoned and sautéed in garlic and oil – no heavy cream to weigh down the meal.

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And the potatoes were so unique. They seemed like they were ripped up, baked and fried fingerlings with caramelized onions. They had a really dynamic texture of crisp and soft mixed throughout.

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Finally, for dessert we had apple fritters with chocolate truffles, topped with ice cream and caramel sauce. These were like little doughnuts made from apple. Nice and crisp on the outside, with a perfectly cooked apple on the inside. I’m usually not a huge fan of chocolate but that truffle was excellent!

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The staff was really great here, and they brought us out a complimentary pair of mini bottles of rose champagne when they overheard us talking about the fact that we were celebrating an anniversary. Really nice touch, and the champagne was tasty!

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Overall this is one of my favorite places to eat in the city right now.

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The bar has a great, fun atmosphere, and every item I’ve tried here is pretty much an example of the best I’ve had. This doesn’t come as much of a shocker though, because all of the restaurants in their group as just as amazing. If you haven’t been here yet, get your ass down here ASAP and try some of the items pictured above. I promise, you will not be disappointed.

UPDATE 3/26/18

Subsequent return trips to B&B for the prime rib:

BURGER & BARREL
25 W. Houston St.
New York, NY 10012

The Smith

I’ve been meaning to try the burger at this joint for a while, and, now that the Lincoln Center location is right in my neighborhood, it was a perfect opportunity.

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The menu I found online is pretty nice, and I was surprised to see a full selection of all four major steak cuts. We went on a Wednesday, which is fried chicken night, but we were unfortunately provided with a limited menu when we were seated due to some gas outage problems in the area. Bummer.

Luckily some of the basics that we wanted to try were still available though, like the burger and the rib eye.

First, I will note that the sparkling water was free here. I’m not sure if that’s always the case at all locations, but I was in heaven. I love bubbly water.

For alcohol drinks, I had a local pilsner from a Long Island brewery out of Oceanside called Barrier. I love their Mr. Pete wheat beer (amazing with oysters), but that wasn’t on tap. My wife had the Johnny Be Cool, which was a refreshing bourbon, lavender and honey concoction.

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The food took a long time to come out, as the place was packed for a Wednesday evening. That might have had something to do with the gorgeous weather outside (the joint has a massive 20ft wide sidewalk seating area). But at least we were able to snack on some of their nice bread while waiting. I just wished it was warm.

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Here’s the burger plate, which comes with thick-cut, house made potato chips (they were crispy and well seasoned, though a few were a little over-burnt for my liking).

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The burger itself was a nice thickness, toward the upper end of my acceptable stack-height range. It was a good stack with all the essentials like lettuce, tomato, onion and special sauce to keep the meat juices from soaking the bun. The cheddar was fine, despite my preference for American, and the bacon was good and crisp. The bun was a little too crisp for my liking though. It held up fine throughout the eating process, but it did irk me a bit. Switch to a potato bun, and this burger is a serious contender.

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My wife had the rib eye, with me eating a generous portion of it.

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Pretty good size, but the meat was not the greatest quality. It had a bit of gristle and a poor showing for a fat cap, but I enjoyed the eye meat. Especially with a little bit of the chimichurri sauce that came on the side. I wasn’t expecting Strip House level cooking technique, but the steak was definitely cooked unevenly. It was more like medium in most parts than medium rare, which was how my wife had ordered it. The picture below looks like a spot where it was actually at the right temperature:

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In the end, I think medium was probably the better cooking temp, because medium rare may have left us with some stringy bits given this particular chop.

The steak came with a baked potato, which my wife said was her favorite part of the meal. It was cooked nicely and had some tasty chives and sour cream in the crease.

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I’d definitely come back for a fried chicken dish or even another burger. The ambiance is great and the pub type menu items seem to be the way to go here. It seems like we may have had a rough visit because they were dealing with some gas problems. That’s a shame.

THE SMITH
1900 Broadway
New York, NY 10023

Cafe Tallulah

NOTE: THIS PLACE IS NOW CLOSED

My wife had a deal for this joint that got us a shared app, two entrees and a shared dessert, with a cocktail each, for something like $50. Not a bad deal.

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We started with a pair of pink colored pussy cocktails. Mine was called “The Pink Panther” and had gin, agave, absinthe, pink peppercorns, and ginger.

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We shared a charcuterie plate, which was really nice. The best part was by far the pate:

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For my entree, I had the lamb shank with polenta. This was pretty good, but lacked a little seasoning. It was missing punch, and there wasn’t much meat on the bone.

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My wife had the winning dish; duck l’orange. The skin was perfectly crisp, and the orange wasn’t overpowering. This was a big portion size too.

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Service was extremely slow for some reason, but eventually our dessert came out. We had the apple crisp with creme fraiche ice cream. The ice cream was incredible. I’ve had better apple crisp. Maybe it needed more brown sugar in the mix.

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I’d definitely come back for their $1 oyster happy hour deal, which is pretty much every day in the after-work hours. BUT, on Mondays the oysters are a buck all night long. And the bar is incredibly big and beautiful here.

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CAFE TALLULAH
240 Columbus Ave.
New York, NY 10023

Doughnut Plant

While I really can’t give a full-blown review of this place because I got my doughnut from Whole Foods, I can tell you that I absolutely loved the frosted blueberry doughnut. It was absolutely perfect. Soft, moist, flavorful, cake and delicious. Can’t wait to eat more of these fucks now that I know Whole Foods stocks them on site.

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Side note: the PB&J doughnut is intensely good. Essentially it is a glazed donut that’s filled with jelly and then topped with chunky peanut butter. Why hasn’t this ever been done before?!?? And the coconut cream doughnut was amazing too.

DOUGHNUT PLANT
220 W. 23rd St.
New York, NY 10011

Black Seed Bagels

I don’t understand the infatuation with Black Seed Bagels. They’re small, incredibly overpriced, and taste no better than any other good bagel shop in Manhattan. This satellite location at Hudson Eats was understaffed. It took way too long for my bagel to come out, because there was only one person making orders (and there were only two people ahead of me on line when I walked up).

Complaints aside, I did like my bagel. I ordered an everything bagel toasted with cream cheese, salmon, tomato, red onion and capers. The bagel wasn’t very toasted and came to me kind of cold. Not the worst sin (I like my salmon and cream cheese to be cold), but a toasty bagel would have been titties.

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BLACK SEED BAGELS
Brookfield Place
200 Vesey St.
New York, NY 10080

Square Diner

One of my all time favorite diners to eat at is down in Tribeca. The place is small, and they keep their prices fucking LOW. It’s a low key little joint where you almost feel like you’ve stepped into suburbia, if not for the occasional celebrity dining across from you in sunglasses with a newspaper in front of their face. I always went for standard diner fare here, like eggs, pancakes, burgers, fries, and shakes. Never disappointed for what it is.

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I went to law school around the block from this little hole in the wall, and my first impression upon seeing it and walking in was that it was going to suck. It’s just a skinny, narrow little one story building with old school signage. But I have to say – this diner is one of the best I’ve ever been to in my life. The food is CHEAP too, but very good. Prime example is the burger. For under $10 you can get a burger deluxe with fries and a drink, and it’s good shit. The interior is close quarters: there’s a bar seating area and a dozen or so tables that stretch back into a narrowing corner. The fun part is that on occasion you will see some famous actors who live nearby eating there or grabbing coffee. This place is definitely worth a try, at the very least for the nostalgia and cheap-eats aspect. You will feel like you are out of town for sure.

SQUARE DINER
33 Leonard St.
New York, NY 10013

Taco House

Nothing to brag about here. This is one of those wham-bam thank you ma’am type of Mexican food joints run by Asians. Pretty much everything is under $2. It will fill you up, but make sure you’re close to a toilet bowl after about 30 minutes, just to be safe. This stuff got me through law school, so I can’t knock it too much. I always went for the bean burritos and the guacamole with grilled chicken, because the regular tacos were just too fucking greasy. Shit you pay, shits you get.

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TACO HOUSE
178 Church St.
New York, NY 10013

Pakistan Tea House

NOTE: THIS PLACE IS NOW CLOSED

One of my late night food fix spots, this place serves up great food for a low price. I get the Makhani chicken with spinach and chic peas over rice. Always satisfies, and the fresh made bread in the tandoori oven is amazing. Always tons of cabs out front = you know it is good.

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PAKISTAN TEA HOUSE
176 Church St.
New York, NY 10013